teZa Lord’s life experience is a testament to transformation and the power of LOVE. From a Caribbean She-pirate to a public sharer of “Everything’s Sacred” — We Are ONE is her language. Everywhere she looks, she sees/feels/touches, and interprets the sacred in the everyday. Her early path was not an easy one. She learned about herself as she experienced life in a time of exploration. teZa was an early explorer of both indigenous plant medicines and meditation. She learned that recovery from addiction is a great teacher and that meditation offered her a way to tune into the bliss of being alive. She has many messages to share and this interview is just a start of a rich treasure of insights from someone who is committed to healing ourselves and our planet. 

Join Carol as she interviews teZa Lord, a sacred trailblazer! teZa is a spirit author-artist-activist, a lifelong yoga and meditation practitioner, adventurer, and nature lover. She is also a co-host of the ZLORD spiritual podcast with Carter Lord – documenting their inner and outer adventures. Spreading love, energy, and joy all around the world is teZa’s thing. She is the author of 4 nonfiction books that document the transformation available to us all. Her books are featured in the No BS Spiritual Book Club.

Show Notes:

1. Childhood of trauma
2. Running away physically and emotionally
3. Magical, mystical experiences looking for Nirvana
4. Being a botanical illustrator opened doors
5. Ego death – Exploring the psyche
6. Plant medicine – honoring the indigenous traditions
7. The Mind – our metaphysical organ 
8. Meditation becomes the way
9. Choosing love over fear
10. Tune into the breath with “mind-stillers”
11. Nature – Modern spirituality is Environmentalism
12. Fill yearning with inter-connectedness
13. It is my duty to share our connection to oneness

Social Media and Resources: 

Website teZaLord.com

Facebook

LinkedIn

YouTube

Podcast ZLord

Soundcloud

Free Offer:

The first five listeners to write to teZa at teZalord@gmail.com will receive a complimentary book from among her four published books. 

Books Mentioned:

teZa Lord’s books: Hybrid Vigor, In the I, We Are One, & Zen Love

The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

Into The Magic Shop by James Doty

How To Change Your Mind by Michael Pollan

People Mentioned:

Eckhart Tolle

Maharishi Mahesh Yogi

Timothy Leary

Richard Alpert/Baba Ram Dass

Support The Podcast

It takes a lot to produce a podcast of this quality. We would be grateful and honored to have your support! 

Click Here to buy us a coffee.

Hearts Rise Up Production Team

Hearts Rise Up is a Feedspot “Best Wisdom Podcast”

Audio editing by: Ann Serrie

Technical Director: Christopher Drummond

Music by: Jonn Serrie

Are you interested in creating and hosting your own podcast? Check out our hosting platform bCast. We would be grateful if you would use our affiliate link. CLICK HERE for more info and to sign-up.

Show Transcript

Coming Soon

 

 

 

 

Sifu Rubia discovered the benefits of the ancient healing arts of Tai Chi and Qi Gong as a way to navigate the scars of loss and trauma. An orphan born in Bangladesh, she experienced abandonment early in life, creating intense anxiety in her body and mind. Later in life, the traumatic loss of a miscarriage brought her to her first Qi Gong class. There she discovered the healing and strength-building power of this ancient tradition. Since then, she has accumulated hundreds of hours of teacher training, including Yang Family style Tai Chi, Yoga, and Iron Shirt Qi Gong. 

With over a decade of teaching experience in community centers, drug and alcohol rehabilitation centers, private group classes, and speaking engagements at places such as the Oprah Winfrey Network offices in Los Angeles, Rubia has transformed hundreds of lives. She has given students the tools to maintain health, rejuvenate their bodies and recapture youthful energy and equanimity in their life. In addition, she has produced online courses through her website and company Wei Wu Tai Chi in the hopes to extend the reach of these ancient healing arts.

In this interview with Carol, Sifu shares the positive impact of learning the ancient practices of Tai Chi and Qi Gong to heal her traumas. Sifu is committed to sharing what she has experienced with others who have been through some of life’s traumas. Her message is clear – our intention and commitment to self, through movement and meditation, will raise our awareness and tune us into the body’s healing power. 

Show Notes:

1. Trauma of abandonment and loss

2. Alchemy of movement

3. Building a strong body through Yoga

4. Life force practice of Qi Gong

5. Qi Gong, Tai Chi, & Yoga

6. Melding forms of healing

7. Importance of breath to movement

8. Crystalized emotion

9. Where do you hold your emotions

10. “Mirror time”

11. Experience your dimensional self

12. Breathe, slow down, commit to a practice

13. Find your “Energy Management System”

Social Media and Resources: 

TaiChiWellness.Online  

WeiWuTaiChi.Online 

LinkedIn

Offering:

Qi Gong Course – Live online – use code HRUQI to access at TaiChiWellness.Online

Book Mentioned:

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz 

Quote:

“It is through your body that you realize you are a spark of divinity.” – B.K.S. Iyengar

Support The Podcast

It takes a lot to produce a podcast of this quality. We would be grateful and honored to have your support! 

Click Here to make a financial contribution.

Hearts Rise Up Production Team

Hearts Rise Up is a Feedspot “Best Wisdom Podcast”

Audio editing by: Ann Serrie

Technical Director: Christopher Drummond

Music by: Jonn Serrie

Are you interested in creating and hosting your own podcast? Check out our hosting platform bCast. We would be grateful if you would use our affiliate link. CLICK HERE for more info and to sign-up.

Show Transcript

00:00:04

(Carol Chapman) Okay, thank you for tuning your heart’s in for another episode of the Hearts Rise up podcast. I’m Carol Chapman, your host along with my co-host, Ann Serrie and Concetta Antonelli. We share our own personal experiences, tips and strategies along with powerful stories and compelling insights from guest interviews. We’re here to inspire and empower your conscious evolution, help you tap into your inner wisdom and rise to your heart centered higher self Together we can rise to a higher level of consciousness, an elevated state of being and experience more love, joy and freedom. Well, hello again and welcome back heart centered listeners. I’m carol chapman, thank you for coming back once again for another episode of the Hearts Rise Up podcast where you’ll always find heart based wisdom to inspire your conscious evolution.

00:01:21

(Carol Chapman) My featured guest today is Sifu Rubia. Sifu Rubia discovered the benefits of Tai Chi as a way to heal herself. An orphan born in Bangladesh. She has navigated the scars of deep loss and trauma, creating intense anxiety in her body and mind, including the traumatic loss of a miscarriage which brought her to her first child gong class where she discovered the healing and strength building power of this ancient tradition. Since then, she has accumulated hundreds of hours of teacher training, including yang family style Tai Chi yoga and iron shirt qigong with over a decade of teaching experience in community centers, drug and alcohol rehabilitation centers, private group classes and speaking engagements at places such as the Oprah Winfrey network offices in Los Angeles. Rubia has transformed hundreds of lives.

00:02:23

(Carol Chapman) She has given students the tools to maintain health, rejuvenate their bodies and recapture a youthful energy and equanimity in their life. She has produced online courses through her website and company. Wei Wu Tai Chi in the hopes to extend the reach of these ancient healing arts. Rubia, welcome to the show.

(Sifu Rubia) Hi, it’s nice to be here. Thank you for having me Carol. It’s really an honor. I’m happy to be here.

(Carol Chapman) It’s wonderful for you to be here. And I have personally taken your Tai Chi course and I must say that you have such a confident, calming, engaging style of teaching. I love your soothing voice and of course the choreography.

(Sufi Rubia) Thank you, I’m glad you took it.

(Carol Chapman) Yes, it was wonderful and it was a really nice introduction to Tai Chi. I’ve never done Tai Chi before and I definitely want us to delve into the work that you’re doing and the benefits of Tai Chi and she gone and how they connect to heart centered awareness, the opening of the heart and releasing trauma and stress.

00:03:32

(Carol Chapman) But first I would love for you to share your amazing story of challenge and opportunity that you went through in your life, to heal some of the deep loss and the trauma because, you know, none of us ever really escape trauma me included. We’ve all experienced it in various degrees and you have a story that I think others will appreciate and then can learn from you as to the experience that you had that lead you to the work that you’re doing today.

(Sufi Rubia) Well you said a lot of it in the bio. So my healing journey started from that moment of abandonment by my biological mother and you don’t realize that your nervous system is kind of set up for that trauma and that grief, it took me a long time to realize what was actually going on with me. So that’s where it kind of started. Yeah, the abandonment issues that come from there, the anxiety that my body held because of it and the triggers and all of that stuff.

00:04:37

(Sufi Rubia) So for me, as I was just growing up, I discovered that movement was a really nice way for me to navigate some of those emotions, so it’s very athletic and I like to be in motion. So that helped me, you know, kind of move some of that energy that, you know, not necessarily I even knew was being moved at the time, I can only say all of these things in hindsight, right? But if we speak to yoga practice and Tai Chi and Qi Gong and how all of those have kind of helped me Malcolm eyes those traumas, then yeah, we, I think that’s what we’re here to speak of today, right?

(Carol Chapman) Yes, as we kind of go through our discussion today, I’m sure that you can bring out points in your life as we’re talking about Tai Chi and Qi Gong and what the work that you’re doing, how it has helped to release certain emotional triggers for you over time. But I think it would be helpful to really understand the differences between Tai Chi and Qi Gong.

00:05:38

(Carol Chapman) And also I think yoga as well, because you’re well practiced in the art of yoga and those are all ancient practices, so it would be helpful to really understand the unique differences between them.

(Sufi Rubia) Sure. So, you know, I’m always just gonna be speaking from my point of view and my experience, that doesn’t mean that I hold you know, ultimate knowledge on any of these ancient practices, but I’ve been practicing yoga longer than Tai Chi and Qi Gong and I actually don’t teach yoga, even though I’ve done trainings and you know, I have developed yoga practice. I’ve mindfully not decided not to teach yoga just because it was, it’s my personal space to heal. My yoga practice is where I go to deal with myself. And when you teach what I know, and I think I’ve always known this that when you’re teaching something, you’re ultimately giving your practice away, you’re giving your pieces of yourself away

00:06:40

(Sufi Rubia) And I was just never ready to do that. But for whatever reason when I was doing my Tai Chi and Qi Gong practices and trainings. I didn’t have that same attachment to those practices, the bigger part of my healing, I think came when I was melding all three of them together and finding this really this beautiful internal flow in my body that was started with my yoga was kind of harnessed in my Qi Gong and just really bloomed with my Tai Chi practice. So all three of them are very important and they hold different spaces. So Coming back to what you were asking about the differences between the three. If we start with Qi Gong, Qi gong simply means well Qi means vital force, vital energy prana and the yogi language and gong means to cultivate, to work to you know to toil. So Qi Gong is you know, a prana, life force practice and discipline and there are many different styles forms, lineages.

00:07:51

(Sufi Rubia) It’s really a question of finding the one that suits you best. I work specifically with grounding Qi Gong practices. So they’re very rooting and you build a solid base for yourself in your energy body and then Tai Chi is a martial expression of your Qi Gong. So in simple form, that’s what Tai Chi is and someone who knows martial arts will know the martial applications will be very obvious. Otherwise you see Tai Chi being demonstrated in the park and it’s a very fluid movement exercise usually done in groups. So you don’t, you’re not necessarily looking at martial applications, but it’s more of an expression as moving meditation or a dance, you know a gentle dance. It’s multilayered and multifaceted and then the yoga has just always, it’s always a curious place, I’ve been doing it for over 20 years and it’s still it’s still some place where I go and I discover something.

00:09:03

(Sufi Rubia) It’s a place of discovery. I mean they all are, but that one specifically an Asana practice is really there to strengthen and align your body for deeper spiritual practices. And so it’s part of an eight limbs system. And Asana practice is just one of those limbs. It’s there to build, build a strong body essentially.

(Carol Chapman) And particularly since you’re well versed in what you’re, what you’re teaching, let’s just put it this way, the Tai Chi and Qi Gong. That’s really what you’re mostly focused on in terms of helping others. How do these ancient practices activate heart centered awareness and the opening of the heart? Because what I have found particularly in today’s world, a lot of people have a real hard time because sometimes there’s a lot of trauma that has rests in the heart and they really have a hard time opening the heart. Many people are walking around with a closed heart.

00:10:08

(Carol Chapman) So I think it would be helpful to understand a little bit more about these practices and how they benefit us and why it’s important to open the heart and have that heart-centered awareness.

(Sufi Rubia) That’s a great question and I love how it’s focused on your audience and your own mission. So yes, if we’re speaking of the heart chakra or the heart center or the heart meridians specifically my experience with it in a yoga practice a can, there’s you know, Asana’s, one of them is called fish pose, where you’re literally opening up your heart from very deep, deep place and it can be a little jarring, it can be pretty intense. Whereas in my experience, anytime I do too much yoga with heart-opening Asana, I end up crying a lot. Like I’m just to open that can create another whole other issue when you walk through the world with, with that kind of open heart. But what I found with Tai Chi and Qi Gong is that the same physicality with certain movements open the heart center and the heart line and heart meridian in a much more gentle way.

00:11:24

(Sufi Rubia) Again, this is based on my experience. That’s not to say that’s going to happen for everybody. It’s really, I’m just sharing with you how it’s affected my experience. So Tai Chi is just been a softer way to, to fall into a heart-opening space. It’s just been gentler for me based on the movements with the arms flowing gently, there are certain Qi Gong movements where you’re opening up your arms in a horizontal line, like wide open as if you’re about to hug someone. So it’s just gentler, it’s just a gentler way to keep your heart open and because we sit a lot and we’re hunched over our desks and were not made to live the way that we’re living right now. So these practices are important to keep those lines open and not close us off to the world around us or even, you know, internally to ourselves and going against ourselves. So these practices are definitely they’re beautiful practices in keeping your body more fluid and more open and receptive.

00:12:31

(Carol Chapman) So how did they activate healing based on your experience in your body and your mind and even your heart? I mean, how do they activate that.

(Sufi Rubia) breath to movement anytime you’re linking your breath to movement.

And that’s with any given discipline, You know, swimming, basketball, like the all of these athletes have the mastery of their breath to movement to be able to sustain, you know, the physical demands of what they’re doing. I mean, they’re not necessarily in a therapeutic setting, although, you know, the sports is therapy for many people, but the healing aspect in soothing the nervous system is really linking the breath two gentle mindful movement. And it’s really it’s the synergy of all of it happening together and the repetition. So that’s where we get into the physical healing.

00:13:32

(Sufi Rubia) But if you understand that your body, your body is basically crystalized emotion and that you’re kind of chipping away through the physical body at the emotional distress, then you’re bringing it all together in a in a holistic approach to healing the mind. The body and the spirit, the spirit is taking on the responsibility of developing an ethical practice, you know, in your daily endeavors, whatever that means to you through religion through volunteer work and generous practices and giving and offering and all of that. So that’s the spiritual process. But we’re addressing the well, we can address all of it. We’re right now, we’re talking about the physical part, Right?

(Carol Chapman) What else would you like to share with respect to that interesting term that use crystallized emotion. Maybe we can talk a little bit more about that and how it releases that and maybe even transforms it.

00:14:32

(Sufi Rubia) I feel that you have to approach these technologies and modalities with intention. You can move to move for the sake of moving and you’ll benefit from, you know, from the movement. You know, you do an hour class and you moved for an hour and there’s a benefit there. But if you know internally that you’re dealing with some stuff, then it’s locating it in your body with mindfulness, gentleness, self-compassion and allowing the movement and the breath to become the tool by which your healing that within that that physical space. So some people hold their emotions and their hips and their bellies, you know, in their chest and their shoulders. You know, like we have the warnings the warnings are there. So it’s really taking the time to acknowledge something’s going on. And then mindfully peeling back the layers of the stagnation or the points of tension.

00:15:43

(Sufi Rubia) Again, Still, in my experience, I think yoga creates more tension than release for me. For whatever reason, it’s really through my Tai Chi practice and Qi Gong practice that I find it’s a gentler place to release the tension.

(Carol Chapman) Yeah, I was going to say softer, a little bit softer, more gentle. Whereas yoga is a bit more rigorous.

(Sufi Rubia) If you have a Vinyasa practice, even yin practice yin yoga is very intense. Yes, you’re going deeper into the connective tissue and you’re holding these Asanas for a longer period of time and they’re useful. It’s useful. Again, I don’t shy away from yoga, it’s just I don’t know, Tai Chi is a gentler place to start if you’re on a healing journey.

(Carol Chapman) How did it heal you? Or let’s put it this way, I don’t think we’re ever fully healed. How has the healing occurred for you as a result of these practices?

00:16:47

(Carol Chapman) Number one and number two, how has it changed your perception of yourself and the world?

(Sufi Rubia) Those are two big questions. You might have to repeat the second one. Let me address the 1st Yeah. Again, coming back to mindfulness, I wanted to hell, I knew there was something, you know when you’re when you’re dealing with trauma, you are often find yourself in a reactive state because you’re protecting yourself. So it’s transcending that reaction in your body and again, the Tai Chi practice and the Qi Gong practice when you first start, it’ll activate it, it’ll trigger those responses, but then you breathe through it. What it has done is that it’s created a soft place for me to work on those triggers and because I’ve created that mindfulness and awareness in your breath and in your body in these moments of being triggered, I know how to breathe through it, how to pause in order how to slow down and become less reactive to the situation at hand.

00:18:06

(Sufi Rubia) So in that sense, it just soothes the body in the moment of a reactive situation. So that’s one way and I think the most important way that it’s helped me, it’s an energy management system. That’s one way I put it, is learn how to manage your energy and tap into a different way of existing and moving through the world. And again, when you’re dealing with trauma, you’re dealing with very reactive behavior. Yeah, I’ve done some psychotherapy and that hasn’t always helped for me, moving meditation, moving mindfully has been my therapy.

(Carol Chapman) And that second question was how has it changed your perception of yourself and the world around you?

(Sufi Rubia) When you start moving through the world differently because of these practices. I think this is a place where I would add that I’ve recently started studying astrology and you and I we’ve spoken about that off mike and I feel that even with the decades of these physical practice is the practice of reading the sky and understanding the archetypes of planets and planetary alignments and transits.

00:19:27

(Sufi Rubia) Understanding that in addition to having that body cosmic connection has made me a much more compassionate person in dealing with people and dealing with the chaos that is our humanity essentially. So it’s cultivated more compassion. So it’s a combination of all of it. And it’s only because I’ve been doing it for a long period of time with the discipline, with the repetition, with the willingness to move through the world in a different way, with less aggression. Again, another thing that trauma ignites his aggression, I walked through the world very angry for a long, long time and not all the time. But, you know, there are certain situations that just triggered, you know, a rise of anger and I just I just didn’t want to do that anymore. So when you don’t want to do something anymore, you look for what what’s the, what’s the alternative to that?

00:20:31

(Sufi Rubia) So, you look to peaceful practices meditation again, Movement. But I wanted to do it. So it starts with the desire for change and the desire to transcend the circumstances, right? So, those were the circumstances of my life and that those were the challenges that were given to me without my permission. Right? I didn’t ask for this and trauma will do that to you, that you’re like, well, I didn’t ask for this. Why are you impressing me with that, that belongs to you? So it’s separating yourself from that and the laws of non-attachment. I’ve read a lot of books. So, you know, The Four Agreements is a really beautiful book to understand, you know, your place in the world and the relationship that you hold towards others and vice versa. It just comes back to me for you have to want to do it and commit to the practice. Commit to yourself, commit to your healing. That in itself is very difficult, especially when you’re hardwired for self-destruction, which is, you know, I feel like in many ways I was hardwired for that and I had to go against that to find something different or at least create something different for myself.

00:21:54

(Sufi Rubia) It’s ongoing. You find systems to help you manage.

(Carol Chapman) That is true. I have to admit my go to system has been meditation which has really helped me to become more aware of, you know, certain aspects of myself that were triggered because of trauma in my life. And it’s a way of processing it and calming the mind and moving beyond it. And it really is a matter of just finding the right practice for you that is going to fit your nature for what you need at any given point in time. Because sometimes we even moved through different practices, You know, even different meditation practices. You know, you started out with yoga, but you have really gravitated more towards Tai Chi and Qi Gong for the work that you’re doing with others and you’re getting the benefit of all three of them just in different ways. It’s interesting how these kinds of practices can help us become more mindful and aware of ourselves, not just what’s going on emotionally and mentally, but also what’s happening in the body.

00:23:07

(Carol Chapman) Because all of that builds up in the body and if we don’t find ways to release it, I think that’s really, in many respects, is occurring within the world. More people were to be involved in practicing some of these ancient practices. We might have a gentler kinder world today. That’s not really the case at the moment.

(Sufia Rubia) No, but what’s happening is necessary also, you know, you need to burn everything down to rise again. There are Hindu philosophies and you see it even in cosmology, all of the cycles of humanity, the cycles of planetary alignments and all of that stuff. I mean, I don’t want to necessarily get into all of that. But what we’re seeing is not unusual. We’re in the phase of humanity. That is, we’re right on time, I guess, destroying ourselves. We’re right on time and destroying the narcissism, the greed, the need for materialism, all of that is being burnt to the ground or it’s being brought to the front, but it’s also being burnt down at the same time.

00:24:20

(Sufi Rubia) We’re not going to see it fully diminish in our lifetime. We’re going to see a process. We’re going to see the beginning of the transcendence of all of that. And the alchemy. And it’s our responsibility to do this work. Mm hmm. I mean, I would say google Kali Yuga, you know, I don’t want to speak out of pocket, but the information is out there. Google Kali Yuga. Kali Yuga—the Hindu speak of, you know, the four major cycles of humanity. And so we’re in the last one. We’re in the fourth one, which is self-destruction. And before we go back to the top to them.

(Carol Chapman) Rebirth.

(Sufi Rubia) Yes, exactly, exactly. I mean, it’s not pleasant. It’s not pleasant to watch. It’s not pleasant to be connected to. But you have to also consider its necessity to move forward. And until then do your work, do your part to heal yourself because we are ultimately responsible for our own healing.

00:25:23

(Sufi Rubia) And it’s in that healing that we expand that outward. So it starts small, it starts within your own family. It starts with yourself, your own family, your own lineage, your community. And then, you know, everything expands outward from you. So start there.

(Carol Chapman) What’s the biggest lesson that you’ve learned about yourself.

(Sufi Rubia) I think I’m still learning. I don’t think I’ve learned the biggest one yet. I don’t know. That’s a big question carol. I don’t know that it’s about myself, but the biggest lesson that I’ve learned is that everything is it’s an illusion. First of all, everything is an illusion. And the biggest gift is experiencing my dimensional self. I’ve experienced myself dimensionally. Which that shapes you. That definitely that’s an experience that changes you forever. And when you go through that I think you move through life differently more mindfully more purposefully and with a lot more clarity.

(Carol Chapman) Don’t always believe what you see and question what you believe.

00:26:26

(Carol Chapman) Always, Always, always. And I think that that’s really interesting that then we can save that for another conversation. But life is an illusion in many respects. Everything that was experiencing, thinking, feeling, seeing and what we believe is affected by actually you know what we believe?

(Sufi Rubia) We’re limited. We’re limited with the five senses and that’s fine. That’s the experience of being here on this planet and this body. We’re here to experience those senses. But those senses are limited. And it’s through meditation and discipline. It’s through discipline practice that you experience something else. Again, it’s only through practice that this what I shared with. You didn’t happen overnight, right?

(Carol Chapman) No, it doesn’t even what I have gained through my meditation has been years and years and years of meditating for most people.

00:27:30

(Carol Chapman) That really is the way it is. It’s a process of unfoldment. It’s a process oven peeling all these layers, these heavy layers. And once we peel them, we’ve become a little lighter and in some respects we find some things that we don’t really like about ourselves that we have to.

(Sufi Rubia) Oh yeah, You have to go through that too.

You have to take a long hard looks and some serious mirror time. But that’s what I love about Tai Chi is that it will always meet you where you are. It’s a discovery process. And when you approach it, I would hope that people would approach it that way that you walk into a class or you start your courses or what not and that you approach it with the eyes of a child in the eyes of a beginner and excitement and discovery. And okay, I want to discover something new today. I want to feel something new today. And it requires you to be in the present moment at every single moment. So, that’s another gift of when you’re dealing with anxiety separate from trauma.

00:28:35

(Sufi Rubia) Sometimes you’re in your head a lot where you’re overthinking and you’re projecting you’re thinking back so you fluctuate between anxiety for the future and depression of the past. And so when you have these places where you can kind of settle into, you don’t want to be anywhere else. Once you discover certain sensations and certain feelings and realizations, small things at a time. It’s not an effort to practice. It’s not an effort to be disciplined. It’s a place where you’ve committed for yourself, allow that to happen.

(Carol Chapman) Yes. And it’s a place where you feel and experience the benefits and because of that, it encourages you to want more of it. Because it fuels and fills the soul and the heart with the mending that it needs.

(Carol Chapman) I would love to know what you’re most grateful for right now.

(Sufi Rubia) The air in my lungs, for whatever reason, I’m always grateful for the air in my lungs.

00:29:41

(Sufi Rubia) The gift of sight, I think seeing color is really is a gift, wonderful, grateful for you in this moment.

(Carol Chapman) Yes, me too. Tell us a little bit about your future endeavors and the online courses that you’re offering.

(Sufi Rubia) Sure, thank you for the opportunity for me to share that. But right now I’ve produced a Qi Gong course, a full Qi Gong course, a short Qi Gong set that I’m offering for free and I’ll speak to that more in a second and a Tai Chi fundamentals course. So all of those are live online. I’m currently working on producing an intermediate Tai Chi course to the one that’s already up there, Tai Chi fundamentals, which is the one you experienced and working on bridging Qi Gong with the yamas and the yamas. So bringing my Yogi and my Tai Chi practice together, which is really beautiful.

 

00:30:45

(Sufi Rubia) So we’re working on that and I spoke of astrology earlier. So, I’m trying to speak to astrology, transits, planets and archetypes and, you know, helping people navigate through their birth charts, we go through different things at different phases in our lives and you can always link them back to planetary alignments. So, movement for those things and the house systems and stuff like that. So, working on that, circling back to the courses that are available and I’d like to offer this to your listeners today. There’s a short Qi Gong for grounding course that I’m making available for free. The website is Tai Chi wellness dot online. So T A I C H I I W E L L N E S S dot online. And you can find the short Qi Gong series for grounding and use V. I. P code: HRUQI

00:31:48

(Sufi Rubia) Okay, so for your audience and HRUQI. That course and they’ll get 100% off,

(Carol Chapman) Wow, that is so generous of you.

(Sufi Rubia) And I’ve also just started last week, I’m offering a sliding scale, so I’m trying to make it as easy and accessible for everyone out there. You’ll see that on the website.

(Carol Chapman) We’ll be sure to include all of this in our show notes, all the details. Any anything else that you’d like to share just in terms of your future endeavors?

(Sufi Rubia) There’s always something on the burner. But right now I definitely encourage people to try the Qi Gong. It’s a beautiful short practice for the morning to get you grounded. There’s some tapping in there and then the Tai Chi class, you know, the Tai Chi course. Again, it’s available on the sliding scale if you’ve ever wanted to learn Tai Chi, It’s a beautiful introduction to it, you know, getting into activating the waist, you know, learning how to move and step in that fluid motion that you see.

00:32:53

(Sufi Rubia) And I think there are eight minutes long, the little chapters. If you’re restricted with time, you can take one module at a time and they all build on each other.

(Carol Chapman) So that’s kind of how I did it. I carved out some time for some of those modules and then I had to go back to them.

(Sufi Rubia) Once you have access to the portal, then you’re in.

(Carol Chapman) Before we wrap up one final question. Do you have any words of advice or just insight for others that you’d like to share on their journey?

(Sufi Rubia) I can share other people’s wisdom. I mean I have quote, I look at every day and then one of them is from BKS Iyengar and he says “it is through your body that you realize you’re a spark of divinity,” explore your body in new ways, explore movement in new ways and those sparks of your divinity will come through somebody else’s advice. I don’t, I’m not really good with that awesome.

(Carol Chapman) Well I know that you’re a fabulous teacher because I’ve experienced your online courses firsthand and I want to thank you so much for joining me today Rubia.

00:34:02

(Carol Chapman) Been a pleasure and I wish you well as you move forward on your continued journey.

(Sufi Rubia) Thank you carol. It’s been an honor to meet you and I know that we’re going to keep in touch. I’m grateful for the friendship that you’ve extended and this opportunity to share. Thank you.

(Carol Chapman) Well, feelings are mutual and so thank you so much. And I just want to say to all of you listeners out there, I encourage you to definitely check out Rubia’s site. You have some fabulous courses there and certainly that free offer is available to you. And I just want to thank you for joining us today and listening in until next time. Just keep rising up. Bye for now.

(Carol Chapman) We hope today’s show helped to bring a bit more joy and happiness into your heart. We hope it inspired you to unleash your inner power and rise up to your best and loving heart centered, highest self. We’d be grateful if you’d leave us a review on itunes. Those reviews are important to spreading this valuable message.

00:35:14

(Carol Chapman) We’d love for you to subscribe to our podcast and share the show with others. Visit hearts rise up dot com for heart-centered courses, guided meditations and are popular notes from your higher self until next time. Keep rising up and may all that you love thrive.

 

 

 

 

 

James Mayfield is a Somatic Healing Coach and BreakThrough Facilitator. He is the founder of BreakThroughCircle.com and creator of Somatic BreakThrough Facilitation, which is a synthesis of body and feelings-based facilitation along with inner parts work.

In this interview, James shares his life history and personal initiations that have made him ideally suited to support others’ emotional healing. He’s personally experienced and healed from a variety of unmet emotional needs and traumatic physical and emotional abuse from early life circumstances that required him to seek out transformation-focused work at a young age. At a time of extreme vulnerability and deep grief, he stumbled into the world of breathwork, somatic healing, inner parts work, and structured psychodynamic processes. 

James has been involved in transformational education and emotional development training for 30 years. He is a master facilitator of inner work, serving thousands of people through 49 transformation-focused retreats, 8 online courses, and thousands of private sessions. His work has helped sensitive and heart-centered artists, healers, change agents, professionals, and entrepreneurs to empower their transformation by using somatic tools and structured processes to nurture breakthroughs in their lives.  James is passionate about his work helping others and his service is that of a “repairman”.  He describes how we can all access transformational healing and in this interview, he shares 13 of the many techniques in his toolkit. 

Show Notes:

1. Growing up in survival mode
2. Seeking out transformational healing
3. Ways of seeing
4. Types of Somatic healing
5. Our hierarchy of needs
6. Finding your inner wisdom
7. Speak to your body – ask and listen
8. Healing our divided self
9. Use compassion instead of blame
10. Avoid the “shame storm”
11. Triggers and your inner child
12. Unmet needs are root causes
13. Breakthrough Tools you can use today

Social Media and Resources: 

Website:  BreakThrough Circle 

Facebook

Instagram

LinkedIn

YouTube

Offering:

Gifts for Hearts Rise Up Listeners – https://www.breakthroughcircle.com/Hearts-Rise-Up-Podcast-Listeners-Free-Gifts.

These five fantastic gifts include: 1) BreakThrough Toolkit and Checklist, 2) Sensitive Healers training, 3) Inner work journey, 4) Mini-course for anxiety, overwhelm, fatigue, people-pleasing, and playing small, and a 5) 60-minute conversation with James.

Authors Mentioned:

Louise Hay

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Show Transcript

00:00:02

(Carol Chapman) All right, thank you for tuning your heart’s in for another episode of the Hearts Rise up podcast. I’m carol chapman your host along with my co-hosts Ann Serrie and Concetta Antonelli. We share our own personal experiences, tips and strategies along with powerful stories and compelling insights from guest interviews. We’re here to inspire and empower your conscious evolution, help you tap into your inner wisdom and rise to your heart centered higher self. Together we can rise to a higher level of consciousness, an elevated state of being and experience more love, joy and freedom. Yeah, hello and welcome back. Thank you for joining us for another episode of the Hearts Rise Up podcast where we share heartfelt wisdom to inspire your conscious evolution.

00:01:15

(Carol Chapman) I have a very special guest with me today. His name is James Mayfield. James is a somatic healing coach and breakthrough facilitator. He is the founder of Breakthrough circle dot com and creator of somatic breakthrough facilitation which is a synthesis of body and feelings based facilitation along with inner parts work, his life history and personal initiations make James ideally suited to support others emotional healing. He has personally experienced and healed from a variety of unmet emotional needs and traumatic physical and emotional abuse. Early life circumstances that required him to seek out transformation focus work at a young age at a time of extreme vulnerability and deep grief. He stumbled into the world of breathwork, somatic healing. Inner parts work and structured psychodynamic processes. James has been involved in transformational education and emotional development training for 30 years. 

00:02:23

(Carol Chapman) He is a master facilitator of inner work Serving thousands of people through 49 transformation focused retreats eight online courses and thousands of private sessions. His work has helped sensitive and heart-centered artists, healers, change agents, professionals and entrepreneurs to empower their own transformation by using somatic tools and structured processes to nurture breakthroughs in their lives. James, welcome to the show.

(James Mayfield) Carol, thank you for that wonderful introduction and I’m really glad to be on here today talking to your listeners and having this conversation with you.

(Carol Chapman) Well I’m very excited and I’ve personally experienced your work in a session recently and I must say that your tools and processes are very effective. It takes a lot of guts for anyone to commit to healing and working through layers of unhealthy conditioning those types of unconscious patterns and I know that I have had them for years and years but it takes a lot to cut through it and get to some breakthroughs.

00:03:34

(Carol Chapman) I would love for you to share your story, some of the defining moments in your life, some of the issues, what you’ve learned about yourself, the transformational moments and then look it into some of the nits and grits of the work that you do.

(James Mayfield) Well carol, thank you very much for the opportunity. I would love to just kind of dive in and share a little bit about my background. Good way to start is just I’m 49 years old in the first half of my life I spent up in my head very insecure trying to figure out what I was supposed to be doing and what I was supposed to be thinking and feeling and I was very confused about it. I didn’t have a good map for my own emotions and for other people and the way people behave, it wasn’t working out for me very well at all. And it came to a head in my early 30s, even though by then I’d already had Like 12 years of deeply transformational work under my belt. I went into education very early, I started out my career as a school teacher At age 17, I got my first girlfriend pregnant and so I was a teen father ended up in a very dysfunctional relationship that I didn’t understand what was happening with a lot of abuse and I ended up getting out of it and ended up as a full custody of my son and then put myself through college as a single dad amidst all of that when other people my age were partying and we’re learning about themselves and really being in their early twenties, I was studying personal transformation for children.

00:05:17

(James Mayfield) I was working in a preschool, I was raising a child at a very young age and very, very focused on how can I be here in front of this child and have a transformative experience something so that they either see things differently or they hear things differently, They feel things differently, They experience the world in a different way. So, for the last 30 years I’ve been very, very focused on, on whether we’re working with children or now I work primarily with adults. How do I take the 85 minute sessions that I allow with the client and how do I make that absolutely transformational so that something happens that is totally different than before that session and new possibilities are available and that’s a very different take Then a lot of coaches when they sit down with their sessions, I am really looking for what can we do to cultivate a breakthrough moment and that’s what my tools do is cultivate emotional breakthroughs.

(Carol Chapman) What is in your experience, a breakthrough moment in the work that you do.

00:06:26

(James Mayfield) I would love to love to talk about that. One of my favorite topics, the first thing a breakthrough is, is a significant change. It’s a significant difference from going from one state to another state and in breakthrough work, what it often looks like is either a catharsis, it’s a release of energy that’s been long held in the body. Oftentimes it can also be an aha moment, a way of seeing a dynamic that’s been happening in a relationship or in your life in a completely different way. And seeing it in that different way changes the nature of your relationship to it and changes the possibilities for what happened. It is about feeling something, seeing something, experiencing something that creates new possibility great.

(Carol Chapman) That really helps to explain it because it is really kind of just a major shift in how you perceive yourself in in the world. And whatever is going on with you with respect to getting through that breakthrough, if you could just share a little bit about what somatic really means, at least for our listener.

00:07:31

(Carol Chapman) I mean, we all might know what the term is, but what does it really mean in the context of the work that you do and how it helps people heal well.

(James Mayfield) Somatic means body based and it was really the turning point for me in my own personal life and in the work that I do up until I started doing somatic work, which is body centered work. And some somatic work is more overt moving of the body and appropriate reception moving in space and then other somatic work that I do is more intense reception. It’s about the sensations I’m having in my body, the tightness in my throat, to the heaviness in my chest or on my shoulders. The anxiety that I feel in my belly or my solar plexus. It’s that interior kind of sensation that’s happening. And what I learned with somatic work was that before, an emotion before a thought, there’s almost always a sensation that happens and most people miss it.

00:08:32

(James Mayfield) They totally miss that there’s a sensation of either pulling away or grasping for and the Buddhists and the meditators have been learning about this for a long time that I did a tin dave upashi honest sit and and they focused the first four days just on feeling the air moving in through your nose over your lips and that very specific sensation for four days. We focused on that because what we learned in the VIP arsonists at least was that before any of the mind activity happens, there’s almost always a body thing that happens and a pulling away or a grasping. And in my work with people, what I found is that long before we get to saying something or doing something in our relationship or with our boss or in our life, there’s already an energy that’s inside of us that is directing us unconsciously and there are parts of us that are in touch with these energies and there are parts of us that are not in touch with those energies and that’s what I specialize in, is going in and using, I use altered states, usually breath work to help people to get really, really sensitive to what’s happening inside and then to feel what’s happening inside as they’re thinking about their problems in their life.

00:09:50

(James Mayfield) And what everybody finds is that when we think about our problems, when we reminisce about the struggles we’re having or any dynamics that were not comfortable with our body is responding in lots of different ways, it lights up like a Christmas tree and once you get that and you start focusing in and paying attention, you find there’s a whole lot going on beneath the surface, beneath our conscious awareness. That is not only fascinating if you study the psyche, but also immensely practical. And so where my work, the turn my work is taken with somatic work is I used automatics to help people to find their inner wisdom to basically find clarity about. Yes, that’s true for me. I know that’s true. That is absolutely true. I know it in my bones and when someone has that kind of experience, that’s an aha, that’s a breakthrough moment if they haven’t had that and they know, okay, this is true for me now, I can turn off all of the other things over there that were before the clarity.

00:10:55

(James Mayfield) I don’t have to consider them. I don’t have to be overwhelmed by them. I don’t have to be confused by them or sucked into doubt about which what to do because I have clarity in my body. A felt sense presents clarity of what’s true for me and that’s how I use maddox is as deeply intuitive wisdom that I can trust.

(Carol Chapman) That’s a great explanation. I think it would be helpful to understand what really causes emotional upset an outbreak. I can think of it like logically, but there’s got to be something more deeply rooted there. I mean, it’s not just because somebody pissed me off that I might have an outbreak, you know? But what is it that really causes emotional upset and outbreaks? I’d love to talk to you about that and to do that.

(James Mayfield) There’s a couple of things I want to introduce. One is I use a chart that’s a hierarchy of needs kind of like a Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and on that chart we have certain needs that people have. So we have a need for physical self-care.

00:11:58

(James Mayfield) For example, we have a need for safety when we’re in groups or in our family or with other people or even just on our own. We have a need for connection to other people. We have a need for it to feel powerful in our life and we have a need to have purpose and identity in the world and when any of those needs don’t get met when they go unmet sensations happen in the body are unconscious, lets us know. So for example physical self-care, if I all of a sudden my stomach starts hurting and I’m like I’m not sure what’s going on why is my stomach hurting. And so I decide oh maybe I’ll take a nap and I take a nap, it’s still hurting and then I go for a jog and it’s still hurting and then I eat an apple and it goes away like ah it was hunger, that’s what it was hunger was. What was causing my stomach to her. Well if I don’t move enough I’m sedentary and I don’t move then I’ll get very a key and I might get uncomfortable in my body and I might then get fatigued and actually not want to move. So all these things that we, all these choices we make in our life and all these experiences we have, they have an effect and oftentimes people ignore.

00:13:10

(James Mayfield) They don’t see the correlation that happens in that they don’t understand where this trigger is actually coming from. And so if you examine, I’ll give you an example of say a sensitive child, sensitive to I was a sensitive child and a sense of child and I was in a family that was in survival mode. They were just trying to pay the bills and get things done and they didn’t have anybody watching out for their emotional needs growing up and that wasn’t really on their radar either. And I grew up feeling really insecure. I didn’t really have good social skills. I didn’t know how to connect and I felt very much different than other people and I just wasn’t very successful in the social peace. I was very successful at school. Teachers loved me and that that was a really good relationship I had but I didn’t, I didn’t really know how to relate to peers and so I would be in a peer situation, a social situation and I would overcome was something I didn’t know what it was then. Now I know it to be shame. I didn’t know it for a long time, but it was shame. It was this icky feeling, I didn’t feel confident and I would try to, like crack a joke and they always fell flat because I wasn’t in my body, I wasn’t in the present moment, I was up in my head trying to figure out how to impress somebody when I was a kid.

00:14:23

(James Mayfield) But as a sensitive growing up, I ended up having unmet needs for connection for connection. I didn’t have an adult there to interact with me in the ways that I that I needed and I didn’t know how to do that in my life. So it created anxiety, this social anxiety and the social anxiety, we think is the problem. It’s actually not the problem. It’s a symptom, the social anxiety is a symptom of an unmet need for connection and social anxiety is the warning system, your body tells you, oh, something’s wrong here. I’m not attuned to the people around me, I don’t feel safe, anxiety is helpful, it’s telling us what the problem is. If we understand anxiety as that, it’s not the problem, it’s a symptom of an unmet need for connection. And so all of these different triggers that we have go back to unmet needs if you’re in a relationship and your spouse is doing things that are that are really getting on your nerves there, he’s not listening to you perhaps and you get so upset about it and you get triggered about that.

00:15:29

(James Mayfield) Well triggers are usually the voice of a hurt in her child. It’s and when I say a hurt inner child, I do somatic inner parts work which is body based, working with these different parts of me in one part that everybody I know has is an inner child. It’s the part of us that is innocent and kind of wholesome and we just we want to be joyful and we want to play and everybody I know I can talk to and I can get them in that state of like, yeah, okay connected to their inner child and that’s the term that I call in a lot of sensitive healers use the term inner child. And really what it means is just it’s the collection of thoughts and feelings and behaviors in my nervous system that was created back when I had stress happened. And you might know this from, you might have been a yoga class and all of a sudden you’re in your class, you or somebody else bursts out crying because cinematically they have in their pose, they’ve touched part of their body where systematically they’re holding either some hurt or some tension or some fear.

00:16:36

(James Mayfield) They were holding something there. And if you work with the body in certain ways, in an outer way, you can access that trigger it and then have a completion of a stress response. Most people though take those stress responses that happened, hold them in, don’t actually complete that response and then we walk around with lots of potential triggers just being ready to be pushed by somebody who unfortunately ends up doing something similar to someone who has stressed us in the past. And so if we’re holding all of that in that really affects us physically and our entire nervous system, my work is in the nervous system. I work at an unconscious level. We start at the conscious and then we drop down following the cinematics following where in your body is responding to the things we’re talking about and that becomes a doorway and it opens up and then we’re able to dialogue because we’re connected to that.

00:17:42

(James Mayfield) Like back in that yoga example, if someone felt oh in my back and my shoulder and they just started crying. If they were to stay with that cry and to say a shoulder, I I’m listening, what do you want me to know? Almost everybody will get a response and it will come. Sometimes they’ll just hear it. About a third of the people just hear responses to their questions. Their inner voices just talk to them. About 2/3 of people don’t hear voices, but sometimes they just no an answer. They just get an answer. They just know it to be true. Sometimes they see a picture in their head or a video or they get a memory. Sometimes they get overcome with an emotion overcome with sadness or overcome with grief or with anger and then sometimes it’s just somatic. It’s just attention in a certain area. And if we ask ourselves questions when we’ve activated one of those areas and then listen for one of those responses and then we follow it and keep asking questions and listening.

00:18:46

(James Mayfield) Everybody gets very interesting results that they’re like, huh, I haven’t thought of that in a long time and it’s always directly related to the thing we’re talking. So our body holds wisdom. And if you know how to uncover the wisdom, you can get really helpful wisdom that can guide you moving forward. And if you are a sensitive or if you are someone who is experiencing either overwhelm or sadness or heard or any kind of emotional upset or relationship issues that keep getting triggered than using somatic work combined with inner parts work to go in and find the spot and then talk to and dialogue with that part of our psyche that is distressed. It has been the absolute most successful modality that I’ve ever experienced.

(Carol Chapman) Why is it so hard for people to I think, understand these things? I mean obviously we aren’t all trained in it, but at the same time, we all have these wounds from childhood and it’s hard for us individually to pull out those and understand what those particular wounds are.

00:20:02

(Carol Chapman) How do you go about helping? I know that you know how to appeal it all, but I think the inner child is probably the key to think the breakthroughs getting through to the inner child and getting that healing done.

(James Mayfield) We’ll ask the first question you asked was why is it so hard? And I can tell you that, I can absolutely tell you because it feels icky because it’s shame and it feels icky and we avoid it and we don’t want to look at, we don’t want to feel it. In fact, most people organize their lives unconsciously around not having to feel one or two or three uncomfortable things they felt at some point early on in their life and they are not even aware that they are avoiding that and tiptoeing around that because their psyche is so good at protecting them from having to feel it when we have stress that happens in our life and somebody is not there to mediate it or were not able to fully metabolize it and deal with it.

00:21:04

(James Mayfield) Then what happens is we end up with a divided self, we end up with a part of us that we feel is okay and good and it’s okay to be like this. And there’s another part of us that’s like, oh that didn’t work very well. I better not speak up at meetings because I got yelled at or part that’s playful, The part that’s fun. The part that maybe gets a little rowdy sometimes is not okay and that goes in our shadow. We have created shame, shame actually happened under the stress because Shane was created and instead of holding and like and honoring that part and saying everybody messes up sometimes or you know, he, he must have been grouchy or instead we’ve made it about us because that’s what people do. We make it about us, we personalize things and we know the best way to avoid that pain in the future is to not do that. So we exile this part of ourselves that becomes a coping mechanism. We used to deal with pain and then as we grow up, we have these coping mechanisms of dad was a rager.

00:22:07

(James Mayfield) So I learned very quickly to read the room and figure out what mood people were in and if someone seems distressed, come in and see what I can do to make them feel good and there’s the birth of half of our healers in the world right there is that process right there. And then as we grow up and it becomes the water we swim in, it’s what we do and we forget that it was a choice made by a four year old and very young time in a very sensitive time when there wasn’t someone there to help them process and metabolize something. And so my work is repair work. It basically allows people to find where we’re a divided self and to find out which parts of us have been organized as empowered parts that hold us and care for us and make sure things get done and make sure we don’t get hurt and which parts of us are disempowered parts that need controlling and need to be managed in some way and we end up with these empowered parts and these disempowered parts, but we don’t have any way to work with them because we haven’t been taught this kind of work is kind of a need to know basis.

00:23:16

(James Mayfield) People learn it when they get themselves in trouble and they need it. It’s not something that they learn at school, it’s something you learn when you need it and when you learn how to get in touch with empowered parts get intentionally disempowered parts. Use somatic tools to find where the disempowered part is active in your body and then how to call upon empowered parts and then to have them interact in healing ways and that’s where the healing happens. That’s where maybe you weren’t held during a stressful time when you were younger, but you can come in and you can do it now and repair that and that’s the work that I facilitate for people and it is really effective for relationships because most people are unsuccessful in relationships because we have triggered parts of us that get triggered easily because we have a hurt inner child or a part of us that feels unmet in some way that continues to react against these circumstances and I know how to repair that, that’s what I do.

00:24:19

(Carol Chapman) I would imagine it probably varies for each individual just depending on the amount of unmet needs that they have. Is it possible a complete transformation and know when you’re triggered and know when to keep it in? Not necessarily keep it in check, but work through it. Maybe you can explain a little bit more about that.

(James Mayfield) I can tell you the process that happens, it always happens in a very similar way. The first step is to notice when you come back online when you’re empowered parts, when you realize, oh I was really triggered there and I just yelled at you and wow, I’m really sorry that I raised my voice, it’s noticing and we actually get data on, okay, so it took you a day this time before you could collect yourself and then make up, let’s see if we can do that in half a day and then we work on waking up faster and that’s part of that mindset work of understanding what’s happening when you’re triggered. But very quickly we can get to where people notice it as it happens or right after.

00:25:23

(James Mayfield) It’s easy to get to that point with a little bit of training and once you’re there then it’s a process of like oops I did that thing that I do again and then stopping and then like going within, finding the part that was triggered, having a dialogue with them with that part empowering yourself and like really like giving, holding yourself, I teach people to hold themselves And then what happens is with that little 2-5 minutes sometimes, you know 30 seconds. Then you feel completely different, totally able. Instead of waiting a day to make up, you can now own Oh yeah, I know The part of me that got triggered then I took care of that. I realized I was trying to get you to hold that part of me, I wasn’t holding it and instead I held it. I’m okay now and here’s what I want to say about that and here’s what I’d like you to know it’s a very empowered conversation and then you go from there of seeing how you can head off of the past, how you can notice it.

00:26:25

(James Mayfield) I know what I would have done in the past and I’m not gonna do that. And even I teach people how to narrate out loud things like instead of just triggering and yelling at someone be like wow lots of heat in my chest. There’s a yell here. It’s like I feel like part of me wants to yell and when you start to narrate the sensations of what’s happening in your body, It delays you from reacting and allows you to start to hold yourself and it creates a whole new opportunity that wasn’t there before. So that narrating what’s going on inside of me, Trusted loved one is a really good way to go from very triggered to catching your triggers before they even have them.

(Carol Chapman) Can you give maybe a couple of client examples or even an example of yourself years back as you were learning and going through this process of things that triggered you and how you moved that pushed but moved through it through these processes that you have learned and trained yourself on.

00:27:37

(James Mayfield) I’ll start with a client. So this one client good for illustrating this. She grew up as a good girl. She followed directions. She was a good girl. There’s this man that she loved. She was in her 40s. She was a man she loved and she had had this ongoing on and off relationship for 10 years with and it was the same thing that always happens should start dating him again. Because she realized, wow, we love each other. Why are we not doing this? And then very quickly she would get fatigued, totally worn out not feeling like herself. I feel like I don’t know what’s wrong, but something’s got to change. I can’t do this with you And then break up. But usually it lasts a couple of years and break up and then maybe broke up for a while and then they’d get back together because there was lots of love there and she didn’t understand what was going on until we started doing somatic work. And she realized as we were replaying through some fights that she had, she realized that every time her boyfriend would say things like, hey, let’s go out to eat. And she’d be like, because she’s kind of a home body and she didn’t really want, she’s like, okay.

00:28:45

(James Mayfield) And she would say yes, and then they’ve got to eat. And this habit of people pleasing of saying yes, she knew it was a problem. What she didn’t know was that she found out in the somatic work was every time she did it, her throat, she could feel it in her throat and she could feel it in her shoulders that her throat and shoulders were telling her no. And she was ignoring it when that started happening, she started saying when someone would ask her to do something, she wasn’t in the relationship at the time, someone would ask her to do something at work and she was really too busy, she would say, I want to help, but I’m noticing some tension and the tension is telling me no. And she would at first it was just it was just that and she said James when I did that when I spoke, the tension that my body was telling me it was like an ah ha a light bulb went off in my head and I realized I’ve been ignoring my somatic wisdom, my entire life and that I need time away and I’m a homebody and I’ve been ignoring that with my boyfriend over and over and over again and when she stopped doing that, she realized I can be in a relationship, I just have to say no a whole lot to do that.

00:29:58

(Carol Chapman) What an amazing realization and actually going through the process with you. And then in a real life circumstance, it comes through that somatic wisdom from the work that she’s had with you that’s just beautiful.

(James Mayfield) Our bodies are way smarter than our brain. Our brain has all kinds of ways to justify. And it’s  our ego. So it’s our ego, our ego parts are always trying to stay safe and not get hurt and where as our body is just honest, like no, I’m too tired for that. I don’t want to do that, I want to do that. I don’t want to do that. Our body is so much more reliable. Sometimes you have to listen to it in certain ways. Not always taken literally, but listen in certain ways and know which part of us is speaking through our body at that moment. I love to share just another client with you and then I’ll share something for me, this client. She was in one of my courses online courses and she said, you know the big thing that she was wearing, she said, you know, I’m a coach and I wrote a book and I know I’m supposed to be using video and it’s like I can’t push play.

00:31:02

(James Mayfield) I’ve tried it many times. I can’t push play. I don’t know what’s going on. And this is an example and everybody I know has this of avoidance patterns. We don’t understand or triggers, we don’t understand, we don’t know what’s going on. And I have yet to work with someone and not get to the bottom of a trigger because our body tells us and I know how to pull that out and to unwrap it and figure it out and so on the course, I just said, well you want to try something. And so I had her do some breath work, which put her into a slightly altered state and increased what the sensations inside of her. And I had her think of getting ready to shoot a video and I had her talk about it for a minute so that she was getting anxious. I purposely get people anxious and into the states that they were concerned about. And then I asked her what was going on and then she described some symptoms that were happening in her body and I don’t remember the symptoms specifically, but it was I know something in her heart and in her throat. What about speaking up and about? She just didn’t want to be seen.

00:32:03

(James Mayfield) And then I had her dialogue with that part. It was like heavy stuck heart, What do you want me to know? And then just get real quiet and I’ve already trained her to listen in the five ways. Listen for a picture or a word or a an answer or just a felt sense knowing of the answer, even if there’s no words there or an emotion or sensations and she’s like, that’s weird. I haven’t thought about that and maybe a dozen years and she said, what came to my mind was this memory of when I was in third grade and I was on in the Gospel choir and was on up in front of the church. I walked up in the church and as I was walking up across the stage, my stockings were falling down and I didn’t know what to do. And I looked over at my mom and she was staring at me with daggers in her eyes like you’re embarrassing me. And I just froze, I froze and I just stood there and didn’t know what do. And then eventually I was able to get off the stage and she said, wow, like I haven’t thought of that in at least a dozen years.

00:33:09

(James Mayfield) And so I took her through a process, She was blaming that little girl. She was like, I embarrassed my mom, I didn’t know what to do. This is what we do with our childhood parts, We blame ourselves for all these pickles we get in and instead of bringing compassion. And so I got her in touch with that little girl and that little girl inside of her through her body said I’m scared, I don’t know what to do, what do I do, what can I do? And then I got her in touch with another part of her. I got in touch with her in her mama because she’s a mama and but she wasn’t and she’s a mom, a tiger for her own kids. But she wasn’t including herself in that. And I first of all I brought in her daughter in that situation and she’s like what would you do? And I can imagine her there and she was like oh that’s not okay. I would just say oh baby it’s all right. And she was able to like flood bringing all this compassion and say the words she would say to her daughter. And then I switched her daughter out for it’s like now I want you to like imagine yourself up on that third grade up on that stage and I want you to be the mama that that you didn’t have in that moment and care for her and loved her and she did.

00:34:19

(James Mayfield) And she said some things that were very healing for that part of her and she said I just want to hug her and she pulled her close and hugged her and as she’s doing that literally dopamine is flowing through her body and all of these healing oxytocin is coming through her heart and she felt so much better, she was like, and then she said I was just a kid, it was a third grader, I didn’t do anything wrong and it’s that kind of compassionate holding of the self that heals these things. Then she sent me a text later that she had shot her first video right after that session.

(Carol Chapman) That is absolutely amazing. What a breakthrough, I mean that is a phenomenal breakthrough. Thank you for sharing both of those examples. I think before we wrap up here, I would love for you to share some of the breakthrough tools to help people kind of pierce through these moments of shame basically, because that’s a great term they build up and we feel shame, we feel shamed of ourselves.

00:35:29

(Carol Chapman) So I would love for you to share the simplified tools that you have.

(James Mayfield) Yes, and so I would love to share that. I want to speak one thing about shame is I had many, many breakthroughs around shame. I’m highly attuned to shame and in myself and in other people, that’s really probably my gift more than anything is I’m really attuned to shame and I’m really attuned to what shame does in the body and how it works and what to do with it. And I have a very different relationship to shame than I used to. I used to think shame was bad, it was a lie and I had an experience, a breakthrough experience where I felt, I opened myself up and I did a pioneer gland activation breathwork and had this really big experience where I felt some really terrible things that I didn’t do that were part of the collective unconscious I guess of humans and it was really icky and I was really, I was like okay, okay, I was breathing through it and feeling all this shame in my body and at the end of it I felt amazing. I felt like I had just made love or something, I felt like joyous and light and I heard a voice, Thank you for feeling me.

00:36:38

(James Mayfield) No one wants to feel, there’s a good chance that was my active imagination and my same circuitry talking. But what I got was, oh there is a gift in shame and as I’ve continued to explore that, I found out, oh shame has helped our human society in lots of ways and it has been used by collectively by us and by our parents and each other in ways to help protect us and keep us safe from a very fearful place, but there is a place for it and there are some benefits to it if you get deep into shame work. So I just want to let you know, shame is not the big bad boogeyman, everyone thinks it is, but you have to go several levels deep to the unmet needs underneath the shame to be able to work with it in a, in a good way. Part of what I do is really helping people slowly venture into these areas where they’ve been judging themselves and where they feel ashamed and be able to unwrap that and to be able to remove the shame from it. And what happens is you end up with this wide open energy that and if you’ve taken care of your inner child, you end up with this real joyousness that people are attracted to.

00:37:45

(James Mayfield) And it’s magnetic sensitive healers specifically need this work in order to be able to be clear for their clients. If we’re filled with shame or if we’re trying to hold back and hold down these unprocessed feelings, then we’re not able to really be as present and as available and is in tune and clear for our clients or for the other people that we meet in our lives. So anyone with a heart wide open, we must do shame work in order to be able to sustain that.

(Carol Chapman) Well, I think it’s also interesting and thank you for explaining that because I think that really helps to round out this discussion. You mentioned something about, it’s not only the shame that comes from the things that happened within our own lives, but the collective consciousness. Can you shed a little bit on that.

(James Mayfield) Well, I can tell you that we have active shame circuitry that just like that. A look from someone or a word or anything that just takes us back to anything that we felt shame about it can immediately activate that and send a cascade through our body and change our behavior change the way we see something, the way we experience something, the way we respond.

00:38:57

(James Mayfield) And so, you know, the reason we do this work is to give alternatives to just being held hostage by a nervous system that’s wrapped in shame or that is tied to previous stresses that have never been fully metabolized. And if we haven’t done shame work, then you absolutely are wearing blinders and there is a part of you that is trying to keep you unconscious and away from certain feelings. So you don’t feel them and experience them and it’s doing that to try to help you, but it’s not really helping you. And there’s a level of maturity that we can get to where we start to go back and repair these areas and it gives us tremendous capacity to be able to hold space for others. Once we’ve taken those journeys ourselves, right?

(Carol Chapman) And I can imagine that we take in those things that are happening in the world societies perspective or maybe not even perspective, but just the way society dictates certain things and that can affect us internally as well.

00:39:59

(James Mayfield) Oh absolutely. The cultural conditioning that happens, you know in families and in schools has a very long shadow looking back now, I’m like, so grateful for the insecurity that I felt and the very difficult first relationship that I had and the just these challenges that I went through, that helped attune me and give me real experiences that then I can make sense of because what I’ve found is that it’s not the trauma that does the damage, it’s the meaning we make of it. It’s the story I tell about myself in my capacity in the world that does the damage, and that’s all the meaning, making peace and we can fix that. We can for that is we have the technology, we have the tools to repair that. So that brings us to the pandemic breakthrough tools checklist and toolkit, it was originally called the somatic breakthrough to his checklist. And then somebody said right in the pandemic. It these are all the things I need to be doing to survive this pandemic.

00:41:03

(James Mayfield) And so it’s currently I’m ready to change it back now. Everyone kind of tired of the pandemic by now. But these are the 13 main tools that are simplified that I find for people that just want in the moment to feel better. This is what’s going to help you to feel better. And if you take this doorway all the way you will have a break. And so the first one is breathed the just. And I know your listeners gonna say, I know I know I’ve heard that from lots of different areas. and so I’m not going to speak to deeply and other than breathing is the only one of our autonomic nervous system responses that we can hack that we can actually change. Not only do it unconsciously, but we can do it consciously and it reverse engineers our physiology and what’s happening, it is the most powerful thing we can do to change the way we see something, feel something or, or even in the way we behave is to breathe.

00:42:11

(James Mayfield) And then the second part is listen to what’s happening is a response in my body. Now that will get you started, The next one is a tuning my presence and the tuning, my presence is a tuning my attention. So for example, if I breathe deeply, so say I’m like anxious about time. Oh, I didn’t get this thing done, I’m anxious about it and I just take a moment breathe and then, and then, oh, it’s right here in my solar plexus. I feel the anxiety, it’s right there. I’m a tuning it. So I’m tuning it to that specific area and then just breathe in a tune and then the next one you can do is sense your body sensation. Now there’s some other things you can do with a tuning your presence, but I’m gonna skip through it so that we can get to some of these others. But a tuning your presence is very essential. If you’re a mechanic, you need to be able to look at, okay, the tires not flat, the engine starts, the fuel line seems to be working. You need to be able to analyze the system and a tuning your presence is a way to do that.

00:43:14Edit

(James Mayfield) It’s the way I can attune my presence too, my anxiety, I can attune my presence to the confident part of me that has done this before and knows I can do it. I can tune in all different ways and that’s the currency I have is where am I going to put my attention and everything follows that for a breakthrough to happen. We have to attune our presence. We have to have an expanded consciousness bigger and different than before. When we were just in pain, we have to attune our presence in specific ways. One of the ways to do that is to our body sensations. When we attune ourselves to our body sensations, then we can actually dialogue. Like I can go into my solar plexus and say, what are you really worried about? And then there’s different flavors that might say, you didn’t get this done and they’re gonna be mad. Oh, I’m worried about their anger. It could go to, you never get things done, You’re such a loser. Oh, my critical voices in here and I’ve got to work with that. The flavor of the response tells you where to do the work just like if I were a mechanic, Oh, the tire’s flat, that’s why you can’t go, let’s fix that.

00:44:25

(James Mayfield) Okay, now you’re good. You’ve got to be able to attune and then since your body sensations and then you gotta be able to feel your emotions, especially for sensitive healers or impacts, I work a lot with sensitive healers because they understand my work at a deep level. A lot of times it’s chiropractors, acupuncturists, energy workers, People who understand the mind body connection. That’s what I’m working with is the mind body connection. And in fact, chiropractors. I’ve worked a lot of chiropractors and they always say, oh yeah, I get it you’re doing on the emotional realm what I do on the physical realm. They helped to find out where stresses in the body and to alleviate stress. I do the same thing in the emotional realm fact. One quick side story, Zach who is fine with me using his name, he’s a chiropractor and he had lots of tension in his shoulders on his neck. He said he doesn’t know where it’s coming from and but he hasn’t been able to get rid of it and he’s a chiropractor. We went in and did the somatic breakthrough work that I do. We found very quickly that he felt pressure from his parents, probably his own pressure that he’s been putting on himself to be a success in the world and he hadn’t yet made that at that time and he realized, oh, this is emotional.

00:45:41

(James Mayfield) And so we brought in an ally and for him it was he man, he was like I grew up watching he man, he’s a good hero for me and in his imagination, we did imagine a work he literally had. He man put him up on his shoulders after this time that his dad had said, I’m leaving. He dropped him off and left, kind of abandoned him and he was stuck and didn’t, he didn’t know his dad went around the corner and was watching dads do this kind of stuff all the time. I’ve had some real bad dad moments myself of not really being too cute in to the results of some of the interventions we do. And so he was this kid who thought his dad had just left it because he was upset and crying and so his dad left him. And so in this imagination reenactment it was he man, came to him, put him on his shoulders, he felt the power of the man, he felt in his body, he just felt powerful and he man walked him home and he felt good by that time and then he faced his dad and he said, dad that wasn’t cool that you left me that I’m a kid, you shouldn’t do that. And he said the pain went away and it never returned, wow, that’s incredible.

00:46:48

(James Mayfield) So that was sensing my body sensations, Feeling my emotions and listening to my inner voice is so the inner parts work. I do. The whole idea is we develop these inner parts in response to stress and when a stressful thing happens apart, needs to come along to handle that, to handle that. And that’s how we end up developing new parts and that there are no bad parts, even the, the addict to the inner addict that wants to reach out for food or wants to reach out for something outside of myself or in my case, wanted to reach out to be desired and to be cared for. I was very roped into that my first in my twenties, it was it was a big thing for me. I was really seeking outside of myself for validation and I’m totally clueless that I was doing, I had no idea that I was trying to get mother love from women. I didn’t understand that at the time. And when I started listening to my inner voices and doing somatic work around this, I very clearly heard the inner voice that told me, you know, if she likes me, I’m okay, which is a forgivable offense if you’re a human being.

00:47:50

(James Mayfield) And so we got to listen to these inner voices and then find out which of these inner voices are talking the trouble that a lot of people have within our work is they don’t know where to start. There’s so much out there. Everybody says they don’t know where to start, but if they use these tools to listen, it’s like a bullseye. It shows them right where the work is and brings up exactly the flavor of hurt that needs to be repaired, Which brings me to the 6th 1 which is follow my resistance. Resistance gets a bad rap. Like we’re not supposed to resist but resistance is literally the bullseye if I’m resisting creating that website and I’m like what’s going on there for example? And like and then oh I’ve never created that website like that. I’m not exactly sure what to do. Then I need to go find out and like create a step by step. Oh now I can do it. It’s easy. The resistance was because I didn’t know what to do. Resistance is the bullseye. It tells us exactly where the work is. It’s not the bad boogeyman.

00:48:53

(James Mayfield) A lot of us grew up in light polarized communities thinking resistance. It resistance is helpful on the journey. It is a part of having an ego, it’s our ego telling us where the problem is. So seventh and this is probably the most important is find my unmet needs is fine underneath the difficulty underneath the trigger. Underneath the upset. Underneath the hurt, underneath the blame underneath everything. What’s the unmet need and Marshall Rosenberg from NBC Nonviolent communication talks a lot about this. I learned a lot from Marshall Rosenberg and if you go to finding the unmet need, it’s a really gentle way of doing inner work because every upset has an unmet need. Every coping mechanism that we’ve developed in our life. Whether it’s procrastination or you know, that’s just or many of the different ways that we or control. If I control everything in my life, have lots of control there, then maybe I’ll be okay. That’s a coping mechanism.

00:49:56

(James Mayfield) And every coping mechanism underneath it has an unmet need. And if we skip down to the unmet need and we meet that the coping mechanism, the defense patterns, we developed the symptoms. They all go away because we’ve gone to the root of what’s actually going on. Most people are dealing with symptoms instead of root causes. Mm hmm. Unmet needs are root causes. That seems to be the story of our lives. You know, we’re always treating the symptoms but we’re not getting to the root cause I love this eighth would be share my vulnerability. And the reason this is so important is because so many people don’t do it because of shame. Because shame feels icky and we don’t want. In fact, almost everybody seems to have this condition of I want to be just a little bit further along than I am. I don’t quite want to admit that I am where I am. I want to be just a little bit further. And because of that we can never start because we’re not at the starting line. And the starting line is usually sharing vulnerably with somebody what’s actually going on the hardest decision I’ve made in my life, I got the guidance, I’m supposed to tell my wife that I’ve been cheating on Way Back 2005 and I knew it had to be done.

00:51:14

(James Mayfield) I knew she wanted to know because she was suspecting that she was looking for it. I wasn’t feeling held and I wasn’t feeling loved, I wasn’t feeling cared for and all kinds of ways of rationalizing in myself, the choices that I made. But I acted outside way outside of my integrity and it haunted me and it was haunting me and was haunting our relationship and she knew it and I knew it and she fell out of love with me because I was so pulled away from her because I couldn’t really be like fully in and fully honest, fully vulnerable with her because I was afraid this thing would spill out. And so she ended up falling out of love with me because I was only a shadow of I wasn’t vulnerable. I wasn’t the vulnerable husband that she had married and I got the download very clearly I had to tell her she deserved to know I had to tell her. And it was really hard. But when I actually did, when I shared with vulnerability, it was a really hard conversation and I didn’t get to keep the marriage, I lost the marriage. But the rest of my life opened up that I would not have been able I would have it was my get out of jail free card.

00:52:18

(James Mayfield) If I hadn’t shared vulnerably and honestly in that moment and if I had hidden that I would have never been able to do all the work I’ve done since. That vulnerability is the key. No, it would have stayed buried, bravo, bravo to you. It was not an easy conversation. It was so triggering. I went out and she was upset, she ran down and like slammed the door in the bathroom. She was like why do I went out and got a brick and gave her a brick and said you can hit me if you want. She literally picked up the brick and looked at me and she’s like how could I possibly hit you now? And you’re like vulnerability is magic. It’s the magic secret sauce of inner work is being vulnerable. So I just want to underscore that I believe it, Which brings us to the 9th 1 which is choose self-compassion. Right on the heels of vulnerability are in a critical come in and give us a shame storm. If we let it we’ve got to choose self-compassion. We’ve got to find a part of us that’s like a mama bear part or a father bear part part that holds space for our friends that can come in and say give yourself a break.

00:53:27

(James Mayfield) Lots of humans have made this error before you. This is a human thing, you’ll get through this the voice of self-compassion and that’s actually the secret sauce of my work is I help people find their divided self-learn to toggle between a disempowered part and an empowered part and to feel both at the same time, most people cannot do that because they haven’t practiced it. But once you get the hang of it and you can do it, you can sit there and you can like hold a hurt part by an empowered part. Like I had a recent client who his addict to just one of the eat donuts and other things he had the elder part of him, his wise part that knows more than there’s some smaller self usually knows. Hold him and remind him of all the ways that addicts self is in the present moment. It wants what it wants and those are the two things about that and those aren’t bad. It’s in the present moment. There’s good things to that and it wants what it wants, there’s good things to that and to affirm that part and then to say and this isn’t really what we want.

00:54:35

(James Mayfield) Having a part of me that can hold a disempowered part is essential. It’s ki it’s what mamas do for their babies and it’s what we do for ourselves in order to heat And so that’s choose self-compassion. The 10^th one is uplevel myself care and anytime we’re in crisis or we don’t know what to do or we’re just really stuck up leveling your self care is always a really good first step because diet, sleep and exercise helps everything else in a positive way. We know after a good a good night’s sleep, we literally are thinking better. We don’t go down the same rabbit holes. So up leveling yourself care can’t be spoken enough. The 11th 1 is nurture my inner child and I have a whole process. So you can download my pandemic breakthrough tools, checklists and toolkit and it has a very specific process for how to do somatic based inner child work, not just mental activation where I’m just talking to my head or I’m feeling in my body and then connecting to a part of me that is responding cinematically or emotionally and then connecting to that voice of my herd inner child or my critical voice or there are lots of other parts that that we end up working with that are disempowered parts and then nurturing that finding them feeling it and healing it.

00:55:53

(James Mayfield) And there’s a process that you can follow to do that. The 12th one is see myself clearly and that’s mirror work and it’s a different kind of mirror work than maybe people who grew up with Louise Hay, she’s she does mirror work or she did mirror work. Mirror work. She would get in front of the mirror and she would say you’re beautiful, you’re great, I love you and I have found that that does not work very well, because the moment I do that little part of me says no, you’re not bullshit, it says no, and it and it argues with it and it because I don’t really believe it, and I found a much more effective way to do mirror work, which is to use Mirror work and to look and deeply see what I see and to first judge myself, because that’s the first thing that comes and then to go beneath the judgment to be like, looks like this person is looks like you’re sad, it seems some sadness in your eyes, Oh, you look like maybe you’re caring, I think you might be a good friend and like going deeper and deeper into what you actually see what is actually present.

00:56:55

(James Mayfield) And if you have a facilitated conversation or if you know how to do that, it ends up, I’m feeling amazing. There are a lot of people are out walking around not feeling seen or not feeling heard because of the way they were raised and the people in their lives. And when we find out, we can see ourselves and we can hear ourselves and we can fill up that cup and start from a full cup and then be in a relationship, not from an empty cup. And it makes all the difference in the world And then the last one, the 13th strategy is restoring my thinking and that’s a narrative process. I took a yearlong course and applied mythology of how to narrator our life and our story and the world, basically a collection of tools of how to let go of old ways of thinking, limiting stories that maybe are only half true and then how to lasso in more inspiring stories and more empowering stories, they’re going to take us where we want to go. And so it’s how to restore that’s a mind based process to restore e and make different meaning of the events that I’ve been relating to in a disempowered way.

00:58:02

(James Mayfield) So those are the 13 tools and I have 150 tools that I use. Oh my goodness, I chose those because they’re the easiest to use that bear the most fruit the fast. And they’re  easiest for someone who’s a layperson who hasn’t studied this closely to just do this process, see what happens. They don’t get where they want to go choose a different process. Do that? See what happens. So, if you’re in a fight with your spouse, you can pick up this digital resource and you can just look through this list and say, oh, I’m gonna follow my resistance, What am I resisting? I’m resisting this about him. Why is he doing this? Why is he doing that? And you’ll get very specific information and then well, what’s my unmet need let me well, I have an unmet need for connection and the way he is just isolating is not meeting my need for connection. You can just go down the list or you can pick strategies. But these strategies are tried and true and proven they work. Thank you so much for sharing those because all of them sound logically sensible. Like breathe, that’s pretty easy to do and some of them might be a little bit more involved.

00:59:08

(Carol Chapman) I love the fact that these are the ones that are tried and proven and are pretty simple for everyone. This has been a great conversation. We could go on and on. But unfortunately we’re gonna have to wrap it up. What final words do you have for others to tap into their own heart-centered inner wisdom.

(James Mayfield) Honestly, it’s going to the unmet need, finding your unmet needs. So for example if I’m dealing with, I’m feeling needy or I’m feeling lonely then the unmet need underneath that is a need for connection. But if you stay with the neediness or loneliest, that’s not going to be really helpful. But if you get too, oh I have a need for connection, what can I do to feel more connected. Oh I can make this phone call, I can do this, I can reach out in the social space and connect with someone there. It points directly to what’s needed, it’s going to the unmet needs and listen to your body and find the unmet need that it’s complaining about.

(Carol Chapman) This is great and where can people find out more about you?

(James Mayfield) Well, my website is breakthrough circle dot com but I have created a website especially for your listeners, for the hearts rise up podcast listeners that has a whole bunch of links to free gifts and I’d love to just like tell you a little bit about that if possible, you can access that.

01:00:25

(James Mayfield) You can go to Breakthrough Circle dot com and you can find it there. It says listeners of the Hearts rise up podcast or I think you will provide a direct link to there and you’ll be able to first of all get the somatic breakthrough tools, checklists and the toolkit that tells you how to use each of those tools. You can also download a free gift, a sensitive healers, somatic inner parts training. That is a mini course with that, you can actually go through that and learn about inner child work and somatic work and why that’s so important for sensitive healers. It’s also a free gift experience, the 24 minutes sensitive healers guided in her work journey, which is a guided journey that can take you through this process and through the breath work. And it’s a really good way to see how you light up when you think about things that bother you. And then the other free gift is a mini course for anxiety, overwhelmed fatigue, people pleasing and playing small and you can take that as well. And then finally, you can schedule a time to either talk with me or to even schedule a free 60 minute experience, a breakthrough Web based session which I’m offering to your listeners.

01:01:28

I will give you a free 60 minute session found that nothing replaces an experience where you’re like, wow, there’s a whole lot going on in there and I got clarity that I wasn’t expecting. That’s the best way for someone to experience this work is to just experience

(Carol Chapman) Absolutely. And I can’t say enough, I can attest to just having one session with you extremely, extremely beneficial. I just want to say how gracious and generous you are with these free gifts and the link to this page that you have created. And I am just thrilled to have had you on our show. You have shared so much information that will be helpful to so many people. I encourage all of our listeners to give this a try. We’ll share the links and you’ll have the information to grab these free gifts. I just wanted to say thank you James for being with us. That’s it for today’s episode. Until next time. Keep rising up and may love and joy always be in your heart.

01:02:34

(Carol Chapman) Bye for now. We hope today’s show helped to bring a bit more joy and happiness into your heart. We hope it inspired you to unleash your inner power and rise up to your best and loving, heart centered, highest self. We’d be grateful if you’d leave us a review on ITunes. Those reviews are important to spreading this valuable message. We’d love for you to subscribe to our podcast and share the show with others, visit hearts rise up dot com for heart centered courses, guided meditations and are popular notes from your higher self until next time, keep rising up and may all that you love thrive.

 

In this episode, D. Neil Elliott shares his personal story of how he expanded his consciousness and transformed his life. At age 57, to any outsider, he was highly educated, had a successful consulting business, and had an amazing family. His life was going well, but things were not all they seemed. He found himself anxious and fearful and sinking into a world of depression and planning his suicide. Then, something changed. He remembered a manuscript that he received. He then put aside the suicide note, began reading, and embarked on a process over the next year to transform his life.

In this interview, Neil describes his upbringing, patterns of thinking, behavior, and beliefs, and how these influenced his view of the world. Next, he expands on concepts of personal consciousness and the mechanisms of how each of us is unknowingly impacting our individual and collective lives, creating our current turbulent reality. Finally, he discusses the 7-step process that became the blueprint that transformed his life. He’s now making it accessible for others to achieve the best possible outcomes for their life in his book, A Higher Road: Cleanse Your Consciousness to Transcend the Ego and Ascend Spiritually.  

Neil is an author, speaker, and Professional Engineer with an MBA and has worked in the Electric Utility industry for over 30 years.  He lives in a peaceful historic village on the West Coast of British Columbia with his wife and a house full of art, books, and plants. Neil refers to himself as a  science-based thinker that looks at things from an engineering perspective. This background facilitated the 7-step process he used to blend science and spirituality.  

Show Notes

1. Influences that shaped my beliefs

2. Educational path leading to positive thinking

3. Ego won & “Life became about work”

4. The albatross of depression

5. Right material – right time – the influence of books

6. Levels of consciousness

7. Belief – what it is/what influences it

8. Neuroplasticity

9. Book and Blueprint

10. Importance of meditation – Silence & Stillness

11. Dissolving negative habits slowly

12. Being in the space of unconditional love

13. Blending science and spirituality

Social Media and Resources 

Website:  DNeilElliott.com

Twitter 

Instagram 

Facebook

Linked-in

Book

A Higher Road: Cleanse Your Consciousness to Transcend the Ego and Ascend Spiritually, by D. Neil Elliott

Available on Amazon, eBook, and other major retailers.

Offering

A Free Chapter of the book is available upon request – on his website DNeilElliott.

You can find references to the book topics he mentions (on Mind and Meaning, Mind and Biology, Neuroplasticity, and Near-Death Experiences) in his book, A Higher Road: Cleanse Your Consciousness to Transcend the Ego and Ascend Spiritually.

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Show Transcript

00:00:05

(Carol Chapman) Thank you for tuning your heart’s in for another episode of the Hearts rise up podcast. I’m carol chapman, your host along with my co-host Ann Serrie and Concetta Antonelli. We share our own personal experiences, tips and strategies along with powerful stories and compelling insights from guest interviews. We’re here to inspire and empower your conscious evolution. Help you tap into your inner wisdom and rise to your heart centered higher self. Together we can rise to a higher level of consciousness, an elevated state of being and experience more love, joy and freedom. Thank you. Mm hmm. Welcome back. Heart centered listeners. Thank you for joining us again for another fantastic episode of the Hearts Rise up podcast where you will always find inspiring heart centered wisdom for your conscious evolution.

 

00:01:17

(Carol Chapman) I have a very special guest today. D Neil Elliott to any outsider Neal was highly educated, owned a profitable consulting firm, a successful career and an amazing wife and family. But things were not all they seemed to be. and at age 57 Neil was depressed, anxious and fearful and ready to commit suicide in a phrase. He was in a very, very dark place quite by accident. He discovered a higher road as he traveled that road, he found the key to transforming his life. In fact, he wrote a book on it entitled a higher road, cleanse your consciousness to transcend the ego and ascend spiritually Neal lives in a peaceful historic village on the west coast of British Columbia with his wife and a house full of art, books and plants. He names all of his plants. His favorite is a tall and lean yucca called row helio.

 

00:02:25

(Carol Chapman) Did I get that? Right, okay, good. He has three Children and five grandchildren, all of whom of course are all brilliant. He loves all wildlife and domestic pets too. Furthermore. In his 20s, Neil raised a variety of parrots and Labrador dogs. He has a passion for motorcycling and loves to travel particularly in Europe to visit museums, churches and art galleries. He likes to visit cities and enjoy all that they have to offer, but prefers a peaceful country life close to water forests and plenty of wildlife Neil. Welcome to the show.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Oh, thank you carol. It’s a pleasure to be here. I’m very much looking forward to our conversation today.

 

(Carol Chapman) Well, me too, you know, we have had a couple of conversations, but our first one was a pretty long conversation and that was a few weeks ago and when we came together, we had a very heartwarming conversation and then as you were sharing a little bit more about who you are in your story.

 

00:03:32

(Carol Chapman) You know, there was some very heart wrenching things when I started to think about it. It’s not really uncommon because a lot of us go through so many different things in our lives. But what is uncommon is how you approached your challenges in life that led you to a dramatic turnaround and I would love for you to share your personal journey and the crucial moments in your life, what was happening, how you turn things around. And also I want to talk a little bit about the work that you’re doing today. Your mission, the book process that you are putting out there to help others, that process that helped you and that you stumbled upon. I would love for you to share as much as you can about that as well. Go ahead dive right in

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Alright, probably the best place to start is when I was a child and kind of just give everybody a little bit of window into my childhood, youngest of six and my father passed away when I was five years old.

 

00:04:44

(D. Neil Elliott) It was in 1965. So I was born in 1960. So in 1965, my mother found herself without a job, six kids and essentially buried my father and then went to summer school, she had a university degree, so she went to summer school to begin a process again in her teacher’s certificate and got a job to start that September as a teacher. Consequently, you know, growing up it was, You know, I didn’t have a lot of parental influence and we’re left to our own devices and in the 60s, that’s way different than today. You know, I walked myself to school and those kinds of things, but you know, essentially as I was growing up as everybody does. You know, we come into this world as a little child and our brains don’t get to the point where they can make conscious decisions for themselves until they’re about five years old, so that’s the kind of normal development of a brain. And so when you’re a baby, and if you’ve been fortunate enough to be born into this world with a parents of means that can look after you and support you and feed you and you know, shower you with love your this little embodiment of joy and really what you are is you’re a sponge, you’re just soaking up everything that’s in your environment, your parents, emotions, your parents thinking and, you know, your siblings and anybody that you become exposed to, essentially what you’re doing is you’re shaping your beliefs and your shaping your future experiences and as we grow from, and then at age five, we start to make our own conscious choices that have already been influenced by what we’ve kind of absorbed up to that date, then your environment that you’re in, in your circumstance, you’re in.

 

00:06:36

(D. Neil Elliott) You take that information and start to respond in a way which affects your learning and affects how you view the world, and we reinforce those patterns of thinking and behavior as we grow from babyhood to adulthood. Now, I’m telling you all of this now that I’m at where I’m at, I certainly didn’t know this before and I’m still a work in progress, everybody needs to know that. So still a work in progress and anything I say today, that sounds brilliant or amazing if I say anything like that, I know that it doesn’t come from me, I am merely the messenger. Anyway, we grow from babyhood to adulthood and we’re reinforcing these patterns of thinking, we’re learning new things, we’re reinforcing additional patterns etcetera. And we bury those deeply in our subconscious mind and then we have these conscious thoughts and choices and we begin to view the world in a particular way we think we’re becoming versed in the ways of the world, but what we’re really doing is we’re shutting our soul off from its connection with the divine, we’re shutting our soul off from its source and from the light and I finished high school, you know, I’ve worked a few jobs driving a tractor trailer, you know, working in a restaurant, those kinds of things, but I went to university and I got an engineering degree and then I got into the working world as a professional engineer in my thirties, I decided that I needed, I wanted to adopt, you know, a more positive attitude from in terms of how I viewed other people’s opinions and beliefs and their expression of themselves, so to speak, their ideas and so I took up positive thinking, I picked up, you know, books that we’ve probably all read Tony Robbins, Napoleon Hill Dr Wayne Dyer, you know, etcetera and they all have good processes and good ideas and good information.

 

00:08:34

(D. Neil Elliott) And so I adopted some of those but it was always this conscious effort to try and change how I was thinking about somebody and I could do that. But in the end the subconscious mind wins, the ego wins. In 2002 I went into consulting and life became about work, you do good job, you deliver and you please your clients, you get repeat work and if you don’t kind of things dry up pretty quickly. So I worked hard and you know, I made a lot of money and I spent a lot of money and we made some financial decisions. We lived in this beautiful waterfront home which was very expensive, But over this period from 2000 to 2 2015, what was really happening was still in the mental processes and patterns of thinking that I had and I was just slowly going into this really deep and despondent depression And in 2015 I realized oh this is kind of like I’m really depressed, I’m thinking like what’s the point of life?

 

00:09:40

(D. Neil Elliott) I work hard, I’m not getting ahead, I earn lots of money, I’m not getting ahead. I just, I felt like this albatross or this chain around my neck that was just dragging me down and no matter what I was doing, I couldn’t, you know, get clear of that and I just kept getting more and more depressed. And so I started to pick up newly issued books, spiritual books, some science books, those kinds of things. All new great information by authors. We know again and all good processes and stuff. So I was trying to change how I thought about life. And I read a book from a woman that experienced in your death experience. And you know, it was a great book and she brought back messages that resonated with me. They were believable but not understandable if that’s the right way to say it. And you know, they were just hard to grasp even though I believe them. But what her book did for me was it gave me permission to commit suicide. one of the messages she brought back was we are two of them was we come from love, We return to love.

 

00:10:48

We’re not judged after death. And I had this nagging kind of Christian doubt, even though I grew up agnostic had this nagging Christian doubt that if I committed suicide there’s a chance I’d go to hell and I didn’t want to do that of course, but life was so it was so pointless to me. I was just willing to cash it in. So I was planning my suicide. Some material landed up in my lap. But a week prior to me sitting down at the kitchen table and crafting a suicide note and I thought I have permission now to commit suicide. So I planned out my suicide. Our house had finally sold after seven years on the market, my wife had left to visit family and friends in Toronto Ontario Canada and I sat down in this kitchen table and crafted a suicide note. And I was planning it out because, you know, we’re all good actors in our environment, we all put our best foot forward. We can hide all kinds of things. So no one knew I was depressed. No one knew I was feeling like I was feeling and I wanted to ensure that my wife was going to be financially okay when I pulled the trigger and I wanted to say goodbye to my family without them knowing what I was going to do.

 

00:11:59

(D. Neil Elliott) So I crafted this note. I had a plan, but this material, you know, it called to me, so to speak. You know, it promised to liberate me from my thinking if I was willing to be open to it, curious, nonjudgmental and read it. And so I did. I began this process and I thought, okay, well put the suicide away. That was going to be three months away. Anyway. I’ll put it away. You know, it’s delayed a little bit. That’s okay. I can always do that. But I can’t come back from doing it. So I thought, okay, I’ll embark on reading this material a year later. My depression was totally gone. I was full of inner peace. I was full of joy. I was just, you know, it’s just I totally had a new outlook on life and so I’ve carried on with this process and I wanted to share this with everybody. I could I wanted to stand on the rooftops and showed it to the world and I thought I’d be looked at like an idiot. Of course I didn’t do that, but I kept it all to myself.

 

00:13:04

(D. Neil Elliott) No one knew about it, No one knew about this transition. And I decided after a couple of years, the best way for me to do that is to write a book and my goal with my book, of course, is to help people the new knowledge I gained, the logical and rational information that bridges this gap between spirituality and science in a very specific process that’s tangible that, you know, I found I could do and it made sense to me, just made all the difference in the world with making this leap and with actually understanding who we really are at the core of our being and what we’re here to do and we’re meant to do, and at some point each of us will do it. The question is just when and how. So I want to share the process. I went through, I’ve done that in my book and my goal is to help people that, you know, if it rings true to you and you follow this process, you can totally transform how you think and as we individually change and we become this expression of unconditional love and we understand what we’re here to do and why we’re here and what this process looks like.

 

00:14:22

(D. Neil Elliott) We will eventually bring this whole world into a new era of love and peace. And so my part is to try and get this out to people so that they can read it and make a decision for themselves.

 

(Carol Chapman) Well, I have to admit, I’ve read the book and it’s very, very compelling. The steps that you go through. People go through a lot of different changes in their lives and we each have an opportunity to take the time to find what process, what approach, what’s going to work for us in terms of really understanding more about ourselves, where we come from, who we are. And I’ve studied a lot of different things myself, but I’ve found that what you have presented is something very, very compelling now. It may not work for everyone. I think part of it is our commitment to our own personal development, our own personal spiritual growth. I think that is probably the most important thing, but I would love for you to share your experience as you were going through the process of unfoldment.

 

00:15:34

(Carol Chapman) And the steps that you describe in the book that over the course of a year really helped you just turn things around because it’s really all about breaking through the barrier of the ego and moving beyond it, moving beyond mind and breaking away the illusion of everything else. Can you share a bit more about that?

 

(D. Neil Elliott)  Yes, absolutely. And you’re right, I believe, you know, everybody needs to find a path that makes sense and rings true with them and it’s going to work for them. And so the difference for me given, because I’m an engineer or well, this is my rationale anyway, because I’m an engineer and I have this, I like to be able to observe and measure and calculate. And I look at things that way from this rational logic, scientific perspective, I needed a process that bridged this gap from spirituality to science. That made sense to me.

 

00:16:38

(D. Neil Elliott) And then enabled me to then follow the process to begin this process of a spiritual awakening. And there were some preparatory books for me that now I’m going to say that the books that I’m going to talk about now or the process I’m going to talk about now was actually preordained almost two open me up so that I would accept this blueprint material that I will also share some information on.

 

(Carol Chapman) And I was hoping you would do that as well.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Yes, absolutely. And this blueprint material that I talked about once someone’s read a higher road cover to cover and decided they want to embark on this process. You know, if it makes sense to them, then I provide all of this material that I used for free. I put it in a pdf format. I’ve reformatted it with more white space so that it’s easier to read than the material that I, you know, than the source material. So if I go back, you know, the first thing that I needed to do in this awakening for me was truly understand that consciousness is beyond our brain.

 

00:17:50

(D. Neil Elliott) So for me it was I used to think that everything I thought was in my brain, something I learned or was exposed to or educated in. And my concept of consciousness now is and I’m going to talk about two or three levels here. So the first shift for me was to understand that consciousness was not only in my brain but was throughout my entire body and all around us. And that happened through this process of some authors that I share in my book. And I recommend people read them if you know, they’re not familiar with this material. But the first one was a book on mind and memes and a key point out of this book and there’s many but a key point for me out of this book that started this transition for me was to fully and completely understand that everything that I thought was right or wrong, good or bad, true or false is really just a belief. And what that enabled me to do is say things that I thought as right or wrong, etcetera. There would be other ways to look at it.

 

00:18:54

(D. Neil Elliott) And maybe it’s not true, Maybe it’s just my belief that it’s true. And so with that realization also came this realization that what we choose to think about as good or bad, right or wrong, true or false, just a belief. And that we are totally influenced by what happened in our childhood through to present day and that we continually are influenced by all these externalities in our environment by all of the things that are prolific on the internet these days or in news or on radio or podcast or you know that we read in magazines and newspapers and we watching tv and films and the things that we reinforce and continually gravitate to are consistent with our beliefs. So my concept of consciousness now and it will go beyond this.

 

00:19:59

(D. Neil Elliott) But you know, I view it as something that’s in my brain but also outside of me and what I’m thinking about is really just a stream that passes by my awareness and I’ll choose a thought out of that stream. We do this in a nanosecond, I’ll choose a thought, I’ll look at it if I like it, I keep it, I dwell on it and it might be a thought that’s a happy or loving thought or it could be a thought of hate or anger, any negative emotion that you can think about, but if it’s consistent with our thinking, we take it and we dwell on it. And if we don’t like the thought, we don’t agree with it, we just throw it back in the street what we watch and what we expose ourselves to every moment of every day, pollutes that stream and we just continually to reinforce the thoughts and things that we think about. So this is kind of a new, expanded concept of consciousness. For me, the next thing I read was a book on a mind and biology and it was really a book that, you know, in short strokes is what we think about, and this is now all known in science and documented, etcetera.

 

00:21:14

(D. Neil Elliott) So it fits with my engineering is what we think about affects the expression of a cell. The expression of a cell is the work that it does. So we can either promote the health and well-being of ourselves or we can be detrimental to them. And so that was a new concept for me that I had not thought about before. I always thought illnesses were just these random things that we got or how we’re feeling, but you know, we’re actually promoting the well-being of our selves by how we think or we are being detrimental to it. Then the next kind of book in this progression for me was a book on neuroplasticity. And before the 1960s, science always thought the brain grew to a certain size And then it atrophied as you got older and in the 1960s, they discovered that, you know, you can change the neural pathways and how you think in the brain, you reinforce ones that happen quickly or you can change them, but it takes effort and a process to do that and you can grow new brain cells.

 

00:22:21

(D. Neil Elliott) So the brain doesn’t necessarily atrophy. It can, but it doesn’t have to. So these are great books are easy reads and the one on neuroplasticity or there’s two, I put in a higher road to consider one’s very technical. The other easy read one, you know, uses examples of people that perhaps had a brain injury and then how they changed how they thought to change their neural pathways, grow new brain cells and alleviate all, or some of the effects of the brain injury. And so what this did is it just opened this entire thing up for me. You know, everything I think about is really just a belief, our beliefs, and our thinking then affect our biology and affects how we think and affects the structure of our brain. Then I read this in your death experience about a woman who had a near death experience. She was suffering from an aggressive cancer and over a four year period, her body became riddled from her waist to her head of full of hummus. At the end of that four year period, she had open weeping lesions in her skin and she fell into a coma.

 

00:23:32

(D. Neil Elliott) She dropped from a normal body weight to 75 pounds, couldn’t lift her head, and was an oxygen 24 hours a day, fell into a coma. They rushed her to the hospital, The admitting physicians told her husband and family she wouldn’t make it through the night. And she woke up 24 hours later and declared she would be okay. And within two weeks they couldn’t find a trace of cancer in her body. Again, all medically documented. And her book really describes what her experience was like when she had this near death experience. And when she was in this coma, she brought back specific messages. We come from love. We returned to love. We’re not judged after death. She felt she was becoming a part of everything in the universe and that everything possessed consciousness. And she has a really colorful and good descriptions that just stretched my concept of consciousness. And then I had this blueprint material and this blueprint material, did this in depth bridge between spirituality and science.

 

00:24:39

(D. Neil Elliott) It uses such logic and rational ideas and concepts that we all know about today and science. But you know, we didn’t know 100 years ago and then does this bridge. And I outlined all of this in a higher road. So what happened then was I began this process. You’ll learn how to meditate in this process comes later in the material for a very specific reason and that you need to understand some of these concepts and gained this new knowledge before you learn how to do the meditation, that’s going to do the job for you, so to speak. And as it began this process, What happened at about the seven month level and you’re right, you need to be dedicated and committed to this process. But at seven months what happened is I felt this little tingly at the top of my head and I didn’t know what it was, it was about the size of a dime and it kind of felt odd. But you know, I just kept following the process and then that little area just grew bigger and bigger and I finally realized that what I was doing was I was impressing new knowledge in new brain cells, the top most parts of the brain underneath the skull today that opening, you could put a ball over my head and it goes down almost to the bottom of my ears.

 

00:26:00

(D. Neil Elliott) So what happened was that works at a higher level of consciousness a higher frequency. And as I went through this process, I came to understand that what was happening to me was as I was meditating, I was going through these shifts of higher frequency of consciousness until I got to a point where well and I keep going through these shifts. But I got to a point where the spiritual energy would flow in through this opening at the top of my head and it would fill my head and then over time it would go into various parts of my body and I go into my chest or my solar plexus or down one leg and up the other, or in my entire body all at once, About 13 months after I began this process, I went into two meditations a couple of days apart. And what it did was it confirmed everything that I was beginning to understand that this process was giving me truth and it is the truth.

 

00:27:00

(D. Neil Elliott) But these two meditations just made that faith unshakable and I went into this meditative state where I shift in this high frequency of vibration and my entire body was just full of unconditional love. I didn’t care how I felt, I didn’t care, I didn’t care what state my body was in what kind of pain it was in, what kind of illness it was in. I just felt fully supported, not judged full of unconditional levels. Just it was filling me and it was so incredible and so impossible to describe in human terms. We just don’t have the language I had two of these meditations like this a couple of days apart and what that did for me is it just totally confirmed for me that everything I now knew at that point was true. And then, as I’ve carried on with this process from, You know, that would have been December of 2018, that would have been 13 month mark as I carry on from that period to today.

 

00:28:16

(D. Neil Elliott) Things that I read and understood in this material a year ago, two years ago, three years ago has just deepened and my understanding and my knowledge or complete, I’ll use the word understanding again because I can’t think of anything else. But my complete understanding of it has just evolved over time and I just I understand what I’m reading now in an entirely new and different way. This is like an evolving process. It is just my faith is unshakable and this process is just for lack of a better word. Just, it’s magical, it’s amazing, It is magnificent. And I just want to share it with everybody if I could like everybody to read my book and make a decision for themselves because this is the, you know, it’s going to ring true for some people and this can be the difference of carrying on the way they live or transforming their lives.

 

00:29:18

(Carol Chapman) Absolutely. Can you describe in a little bit more detail than meditation technique that’s used in the process?

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Yes. Okay, so I picked up some meditation techniques in the 90s and I practiced them over a period of time and I tried it and you know, and I was inconsistent with it. But this meditation technique that you will learn the difference for me about this material, is it taught me or explain to me the purpose of meditation and I know there’s lots of good reasons for you know, that people will talk about lower blood pressure and less stress, all of those good things. But the real purpose of meditation is too go into the silence and the stillness and make connection with the Divine. And when you go through this process you will learn to completely stop all your thoughts and you go into this state of silence and stillness and so you know what I do is you need to get in a position where you totally relax your body, I use a recliner, relax your head, your neck, everything because what you don’t want to be using any muscles or anything that distracts you from the state of silence and stillness.

 

00:30:39

(D. Neil Elliott) So I’m going to this really relaxed position and then I begin this process. This meditative process, you have to gain some knowledge about your target and this is all described in the material before you. You know, this process will really work well for you, but you know, it will work and you learn how to you know, kind of get rid of all your thoughts out of your mind and when you do this, you enter this state of complete silence and stillness and that is what enables you to connect with the Divine. Now, today, I still meditate every day. You can start with 10 minutes and move on to whatever you want, but for me, I meditate 90 minutes to two hours every morning without fail. But my connection with the divine is constant and mutually reciprocal. And I can go into that status if you take 34 or five minutes and just sit silently and still, I can go into that state and I can make this connection with the Divine and it’s a strong connection, feel it not only in my head, but you know, in various parts of my body when you know, when you gain the new knowledge and then you begin this process, you just you know that what you know is true and then you just get to the point where you just somehow want to share it with people,

 

(Carol Chapman) Why don’t we cover the seven steps of the process?

 

00:32:04

(D. Neil Elliott) So the first one is really to stretch your consciousness and you know, so I recommend these science books. If you’re already familiar with them, then you can start with step one and really the first one is what really expanded my belief of consciousness once had fully prepped and was ready for this material, was this reading of this near death experience. And so I recommend everybody read this book.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) The second step is really what I do is I share this blueprint material, so I call it truth unveiled because what this material is going to teach you is it’s going to teach you things like what was before the Big Bang, the impetus for the Big Bang. What happened at the time of the Big Bang and then why and how creation occurred and then evolved over the millions and billions of years and it’s going to give you the mechanisms that we know in science today, that we use moment by moment to create every experience in every event that comes into our life.

 

00:33:11

(D. Neil Elliott) And when you understand these mechanisms and you understand the processes of these mechanisms, I believe you then can make a conscious choice around living like you currently do and carrying on or you can make a conscious choice to start this transformation to align your thinking and totally change. You’re not only conscious thinking, but your subconscious thinking. And so that’s the material. The rest are steps.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) So step three is really a reflection and it is for you too, as you begin this process for you to sit down. Be totally truthful with yourself and honest and write down how you really feel about life. Are you happy with it or would you rather call it quits? And this is a letter or document that’s only for you. It’s for no one else. It’s not to please a God. It’s not to show your wife or your family or your husband or your friends. It is only for you and you’re going to seal that away and you open it in your letter so that you can compare how you felt at the time about life and then what your new concept and your new understanding as a year later.

 

00:34:28

(D. Neil Elliott) The fourth step is really how to cleanse your consciousness. So the things that we think about in our conscious mind, we need to cleanse and we make choices about where those thoughts are and then we also need to and this is the more difficult part is you need a process to be able to break up and dissolve the patterns of behavior that you’ve already embedded and programmed in your subconscious mind. So those patterns and those behaviors are like concrete. They’re very hard to break up and they’re very hard to dissolve. And so it takes time, energy and effort to do that. And it happens slowly and it happens slowly because if you were to immediately change, you know, it may have negative consequences for this lifetime for you, you may go into a suicidal position. So this happens slowly.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Step five is really rebuilding your consciousness into golden qualities of, you know, aspirations of divine consciousness. So you’re going to, as you learn this material, you will come up with what you think and it may be totally accurate or it may not be yet you think of what the golden qualities of divine consciousness are.

 

00:35:46

They’re described and they’re expressed about whether you actually grasp their real meaning to begin with. You know, that’s entirely up to the person and where that person is at. So you’ll start to rebuild with qualities that are consistent with the divine and then

 

(D. Neil Elliott) The six step is, you know, learning this meditation, learning one prayer and one prayer only that you’re going to recite at the beginning of this meditation and you need to have this knowledge to be able to understand your target in this prayer and when you understand your target, then this prayer is quite simple and it’s straightforward and it’s the only thing you’re going to need to do that’s kind of from wrote, so to speak and then

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Step seven is really rinse and repeat. You know, you’re just, you’re going to go back and you’re going to loop through these steps from cleansing and rebuilding and doing your meditation.

 

(Carol Chapman) Let me ask you this after you’ve gone through this entire process and I want to thank you for sharing those steps because I think they’re very critical and I would imagine each and every one is important, but you know, as I was thinking about steps four and five, the cleansing of the ego and all your beliefs and all that.

 

00:37:04

(Carol Chapman) Just kind of cleansing everything out and then step five being the rebuilding, I would think they seem to me to be the most crucial elements of the process, although all of the pieces are important in the process. I’m just wondering at this point, have you achieved a constant communication with the divine at all times.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) I would say yes to that and know that that may shift and evolve for me and get even deeper and stronger than it currently is or not, I don’t know. So I don’t worry about what’s going to happen in the future. I just continue to follow the process. So right now, for instance, even as we’re having this conversation, I’m getting direction and inspiration in terms of what to talk about or what to say. You know, this is really a process. It’s much more about feeling, but you will also, you know, you may be inspired or you may have direct instructions, they might be subtle or they might be quite stronger.

 

00:38:14

(D. Neil Elliott) It really depends on kind of where you’re at. Let’s talk a little bit about the reason why we’re here. So we have to take the frame of reference off of one life and your soul. There’s going to be a bunch of stuff here so that I’m not going to talk about necessarily, but your soul is a fragment of divine consciousness. So divine consciousness comes from universal consciousness. You’ll understand all of this when you read the material and divine consciousness, let me back up universal consciousnesses in silence and stillness. It is opposing impulses at the time of the Big Bang, these impulses, which you’ll learn what these all are. But these are were torn apart to form divine consciousness so that universal consciousness could experience itself and universal consciousness is unconditional love. Divine consciousness is unconditional love, but it also works in this material form through electromagnetism to create everything that we see in the universe.

 

00:39:22

(D. Neil Elliott) So we know from science today that at a subatomic level everything is just energy, There’s nothing that’s solid in the universe, everything is just energy. So science believes there was a big bang out of that big bang came electromagnetism and came the birth of the Galaxies and stars and universe. And they believe that these electrical particles randomly got together to form elements, these elements randomly got together to form a living molecule. These living molecules randomly got together to form the first living cell and then over billions of years we have the life forms that we see today. And what this material will do is it will describe exactly this process and how all of this works and how all of this evolves. And it does it in not engineering mathematical, let me do a calculation type way, but it gives you concepts of all of this information. This is so logical and rational that you will be able to understand how and why the universe comes into being.

 

00:40:30

(D. Neil Elliott) So the reason your soul comes here as a fragment of divine consciousness. It is injected into the conception process at the time of sperm and ova known, fertilizing the egg and your soul is perfect. Your soul is unconditional love as we grow older and we adopt these patterns of belief. What we’re doing is we’re through this process of electromagnetism. These consciousness forms that we create, binds down our soul and cuts it off from the light and our ego takes control of everything we think about and our responses to life. Our soul’s purpose over many, many lifetimes is to evolve and to experience and to make its way back to the divine while it is still in materialist form. So you and I and everyone will be reincarnated in varying genders, varying colors of skin, varying places of origin, varying cultures, different religions, you’ll be poor in some lifetimes, wealthy and others.

 

00:41:40

(D. Neil Elliott) You’ll be living on the street in some lifetimes, living in mansions and others and all of these experience from the soul’s perspective is to learn the lessons that it needs to learn. And when you look at this, it’s only through lessons of suffering does the journey and soul gain self-knowledge to retain individuality. After discarding the ego and you know, your purpose over lifetimes and lifetimes is to get to the point where your soul wakes up, understands what it’s doing to itself through these processes of its thinking and its feelings and its responses to life and then use the mechanisms of creation, electromagnetism, we think with electrical impulses in our brain, we feel with magnetic impulses in our nervous system and our thoughts, our consciousness plans whether it’s something that we like or don’t like and our electromagnetism feelings, whether it is a feeling of love or a feeling of hate, bonds these consciousness plan into a blueprint and then we reinforced that blueprint over time through repeated thinking and feeling and at some point that will materialize itself and manifested form as an event or an experience or an illness in our life and when we actually learn these mechanisms and why and how all of this works, we have the choice to actually carry on as we currently are or to start to make these shifts and go through this process of cleansing these ego impulses of selfishness and detrimental thinking to enable us to have of thinking which is consistent with the divine and begin this process of a spiritual awakening Neal.

 

00:43:41

(Carol Chapman) I have another question that I think would help to round out what you have just described in this process and your own experience and as you were really kind of sharing, you know, bridging the gap between science and spirituality. I would love for you to share how you manifested the Lexus convertible because we didn’t talk about that, that’s part of your story is I think one of the things that was a major trigger for you, I mean there were triggers all along the way that got you to where you are, but it really helps to demonstrate how the universe actually works.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Yeah, and for me it was a great example to share with people because it just made so much sense afterwards after I knew what I knew what I know today. So in 2011 I think it was, I had this dream car at the time, it was a hard top Lexus convertible, gray and I thought oh at some point I’ll save up my money and you know, I might buy that car, but every day what I did was I thought about that car and I imagine myself driving this twisty road that was up to our waterfront home in this car, top down wind in my hair.

 

00:44:57

(D. Neil Elliott) And I felt that whole joy of that experience with no compunction about running out and buying the car. But you know, I did that every day and I described this in my book, what I did a year after I began that process and this consistent thinking and feeling that car, I bought $100 lottery ticket which I do every year to support our pacific national exhibition in Vancouver. And the main draw is always a house which you know, I always had my eye on winning the house and they have they typically back then had 12 cars they were giving away in addition, never paid any attention to the cars because I always had a car and always got a car I liked. And so a year after I began that process of dreaming about this Lexus, I bought a ticket in the spring and then this draw happened in September kind of even forgot about the draw, thinking I’ll get a phone call for the house and one day the phone rang and I had one, this Lexus convertible and I didn’t even know what it was.

 

00:45:59

(D. Neil Elliott) I didn’t even know the model number. I said oh well what kind of Lexus is that? And they said oh it’s a hard top convertible and I you know kind of oh what kind of hard top convertible. And they told me the name and stuff. Anyway, it ended up being this gray Lexus convertible that I had been imagining had a picture on my wall every day and I thought well this is great. I’m just I’m just lucky. This is amazing you know that I won this For us. It was a $60,000 car in Canada. And then I learned the processes, you know, later on now I’ve learned these processes and I understand now what I was doing was I was creating this consciousness blueprint of this Lexus convertible. Like I was imagining this gray Lexus convertible, this hard top had a picture of it on my wall and just reinforcing it with with these emotions and thinking that I did every day that just ended up kind of magnetized into itself. This manifestation of this Lexus. I described this in the book early on and then these mechanics of how this actually works and this is what we do with every thought we have if we have a denigrating destructive slanderous, judgmental, critical thought of other people and we’re magnetize ng those thoughts with feelings of anger or hate or dislike whatever those are, those will attract to us like experiences and you will have no recollection in our human consciousness, you have no recollection of what you’re thinking or doing with this event.

 

00:47:41

(D. Neil Elliott) Actually finally magnetize is into your life in the future. You forgot all about what you were thinking about or what you’ve reinforced because we create thousands of these consciousness blueprints every day and when they’re all a narcissistic and selfish, greedy and there’s a list, a specific list that gets listed out that you go through this process when they are those kinds of things which are inconsistent with unconditional love, you will magnetize those into your life. So conversely when you get all of your thinking cleansed and you are having loving kind positive thoughts that you are just reinforcing all the time. You start to draw those experiences into your life and those events into your life and your life just totally transforms and your outlook are externalities, what we think and what we see every moment, every, every day is really just a reflection of our beliefs. And so when you go through this process, you will see things that you thought about in the past and you’ll have an entirely new view of that event and that experience and your life just totally transforms it is truly a magical experience.

 

00:48:58

(D. Neil Elliott) And then when you get this connection with the divine and you feel this and you get these instructions or you get this inspiration about what you should be doing for that day or what you should be working on, you essentially surrender your will to the will of the divine. And when you do that your life changes amazing.

 

(Carol Chapman) It’s really all about how we create our own reality. And so really what you’ve just shared here is how the universe is created. As we wrap up. I have one more question really, what piece of advice do you have for others to take that leap, take that leap of faith and transform themselves.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) That’s a great question. I think the best piece of advice that I could give to people and this is an example that I use in my book as well is that you know this process you will at some point in this lifetime or a future lifetime begin this process whether it’s this exact process or some other process to do this work. So for me my wife said to me I was debating on whether to do an MBA.

 

00:50:03

(D. Neil Elliott) And she said well and I was debating I don’t know whether I want to do this. You know it’s part time. I got to work and she said to me well how long does it take? And I said two years and she said well so two years from now you can look back and say that you’ve done it or you can look back and say that you wish you did that time is going to pass anyway. So what do you want to do? I give the same thought to other people. If this process takes a year or two years for you or six months for you. If you start it now, let’s say it’s a two year process for you. So consistent with my M B. A. In two years, you can look back and you can say I did it or you didn’t do it and if you do it, I firmly believe that your life will entirely change and how you feel internally and how you express yourself to the world will be entirely different and you will be a happy, more joyous, loving kind person.

 

(Carol Chapman) Thank you for that. And I think that all comes from your own the voice of experience. I mean that’s your personal experience and you know it works and I just want to thank you so much for being with us today.

 

00:51:09

(Carol Chapman) And where can people find out more about you?

 

(D. Neil Elliott) My website is D Neil Elliott dot com. That’s D N E I L E L L I O T T dot com. The book is a higher road, cleanse your consciousness to transcend the ego and ascend spiritually. A seven step process to inner peace. Joy, love, abundance and prosperity. It’s by D Neil Elliott. And the D is just the initial for my first name to differentiate me as an author and on the internet and my book is available through amazon or bookstores in electronic version or in print and it’s available globally. All of my social media links are on my website.

 

(Carol Chapman) Great. And we’ll be sure to include all of that in our show notes. And I just want to thank you so much for sharing your wisdom here. Very inspirational. And I think that any of you listeners out there, if you really want to elevate your conscious evolution, it’s time to take the step right now.

 

00:52:15

(Carol Chapman) Reach out to Neal and buy a copy of his book and Neil. I just want to thank you again for being with us.

 

(D. Neil Elliott) Thank you carol and I very much appreciate being here and being able to share some of this knowledge that I’ve gained with your listeners. Thank you

 

(Carol Chapman) And to all of you listeners, Thank you for joining us again. And until next time. Keep rising up. Bye For now. We hope today’s show helped to bring a bit more joy and happiness into your heart. We hope it inspired you to unleash your inner power and rise up to your best and loving heart centered highest self. We’d be grateful if you’d leave us a review on itunes. Those reviews are important to spreading this valuable message. We’d love for you to subscribe to our podcast and share the show with others, visit Hearts rise up dot com for heart centered courses, guided meditations and are popular notes from your higher self until next time, keep rising up and may all that you love thrive.